Saturday, 28 August 2010

Saturday 28/08/10

Firstly, just to say that this is not a London Preppy post. This is not in character. It’s true, and it’s me writing it: NM.

Here goes:

There is a person who has gone too far.

This person has been contacting me for over a year now.

This person was leaving comments on the blog and then started emailing me.

This person set up a fake profile on GRINDR in order to track me down (last year when I was temporarily single and I was using GRINDR), found me, started sending fake pictures and chatting (extensively) to me.

This person discovered my original Greek name and surname (both of which I changed ages ago), set up a gmail address using my full Greek name and started emailing me from it. To put it simply, my current self was receiving emails from the name I used to have growing up.

This person found my sister’s profile on facebook and started sending me emails commenting on my sister’s profile pictures.

This person set up a fake facebook profile and friend requested every single friend of mine there, trying to get access to my information / profile / pictures. He used fake pictures of what gay men consider a hot, muscled guy, so several of my friends accepted his friend request (because I guess that’s what some of them do: hot = accept - it's their fucking prerogative) and he chatted to many of them. I never accepted his friend request (even when I didn’t know it was him yet), because I don’t friend strangers on facebook.

This person has set up at least four different twitter accounts that I know of to follow me on twitter and message me there. Every time I’ve realized it’s him and blocked one, he’s opened a new one.

This person has sent me more messages (via all these sites) and emails over the last twelve months, than any of my real life friends, boyfriend or family.

This person has contacted several of the people I interact with on twitter and my friends on facebook, asking them if they know me in real life and wanting to find more information about me.

I have made the mistake of talking to this person in the past, either because I didn’t recognize the significance of this situation (I have been naïve) or because I didn’t instantly realize it was him in one of his many, many online guises.

Today I found out that he created yet another facebook profile and started messaging friends of mine again, asking them about me.

Looking back over the last year, there is no other way to describe this situation, apart from terrorizing.

I have been naïve and stupid in the past, with regard to allowing access and volunteering information to this person about myself, when I now I realize that I shouldn’t have.

This person has spent a very significant amount of time being online, contacting me and people that I’m close to, using both his real identity and numerous other identities that he created specifically for this purpose. And this has lasted for over a year.

I make no assumptions on what this person’s end goal / motivation is. I don’t know and I don’t want to know. It could be that he’s just very interested in me as person and he wants to be my friend, it could be that he’d quite like to kill me. I’m not really up for either.

I have decided to go public about this using the biggest platform I have, my blog, because I’m a bit sick of it.

I don’t know if this is an exaggeration or not, but I feel that potentially there could be physical threat to me.

My close friends and my boyfriend know about this, of course, and they are aware of the identity of this person. In addition, all the messages I have received over the last year are stored; there is a record of everything.

I don’t know if posting this on the blog is a wise idea. It might annoy this person and give him the final push to come over and shoot me or whatever it is that he wants to do. But I don’t know what else to do – I’ve tried to manage the relationship / be polite and nice / I’ve asked him to back off. But over the last year this person has stressed me out like no one else before and has made me consider deleting my facebook, twitter, blog, stopping writing, etc. I don’t want to hear from this person EVER again, in any way.

I won’t pretend I don’t know what comes with putting yourself out there and creating a public profile like I have done through my blog and my writing, but I don’t think I deserve any of this and I want it to stop.

If I never write on London Preppy again, it will probably be because I’ve been left for dead in a gutter somewhere; but at least everyone will now know who did it.

Thursday, 19 August 2010

Thursday 19/08/10

I'm sure these things are connected to each other somehow, although maybe I'm just saying this to create a - very - tenuous narrative in this random post:

a) My latest tweet says: I'M OBSESSED WITH AMERICA(NS)

b) A friend in London sent me this message a few days ago:

Someone was chatting to me on ___ from abroad and you were given as a reference. See, even in Texas they know you: "Must confess the only thing I know about gay life in London is Chelsea and London Preppy's blog"

THIS PLEASES ME VERY MUCH

c) My next LP post will be a clubbing one. With pictures and verbatim comments. For old times' sake

Bye now

Wednesday, 11 August 2010

Wednesday 11/08/10

I am overeating so that I get a stomach ache and take my favorite indigestion pills.

I often get so bored at home in the evenings that I wish somebody would break in.

I’m not ready for the winter clothes that have completely replaced the summer lines in shops

I’m about to give up on reading everything F Scott Fitzgerald ever wrote in order, just to pick up Kafka On The Shore after A Girl’s recommendation

I loathe myself for having felt more satisfaction when buying a magazine I was on the cover of in my pants back in 2008, than when buying a book I have written in this year

Never have things gone better for me, but I can’t help playing with fire and potentially watching it all fall apart

I rent one movie a day from iTunes, but never watch any of them. This has been going on for three weeks

I regret eight of my tattoos. I only have eight

I haven’t taken sleeping pills for two nights in a row and this is my biggest achievement this summer

I sneaked into the cinema when I was 15 to watch the film Kids. I had a dream about Chloe Sevigny last night

Some people don’t deserve happiness; and I’m one of them