Sunday, 27 July 2008

Sunday 27/07/08

Here’s the daily reminder for Best Reader Body competition, send your pics to london. preppy@gmail.com, rules here, closing date Friday 8th August. 

On Friday there is some work, although mostly yawning (after the night which took sleeplessness to a ridiculous new level) and after work there is some gym, although with very little motivation. 

Then I go home where I pretend to watch TV and do such things as “eat” and “have a shower”, even though I’m mostly focusing on the fact that I might have to go back to work on Sunday. 

At 2014, I receive a text from A Girl, who’s still in the office, and A Girl says: “I’m about to cry. I’m leaving soon but my computer just crashed. Sunday looks very plausible.  I’ll let you know” 

Quite instantly, at 2015 (I really will hang on to anything, whatever I’m thrown really), I reply: “Please do.  We’ll make a day out of it.  I did not just type this, but I have nothing better to do” 

Then A Girl says (2022): “What on earth will we wear?  I’m thinking casual weekend wear” 

Then I say (2023): “I’m not sure yet.  But I’m starting to panic” 

Then A Girl says (2027): “We only have about 40 hours to work this out.  Clearly not enough time.  Good luck.  I’m off to have my neat whiskey now.  Double please” 

I spend Saturday mostly on my own, so I: makes some calls about Sydney flights / go to Tesco / go to the gym where nobody I’m attracted to is even there to cheer me up / arrange to meet Mean in the evening. 

Then Saturday evening comes, like every Saturday evening does, and to go out I’m wearing: loose fitting knee length denim shorts from H&M, dark green wife-beater from H&M, white socks, white basketball Nike Air Force trainers. 

I hate wearing wife-beaters outside a sporting context these days, even though there was a time when I would never go out without putting on one (when I first came out and I thought that having big arms was a major achievement that everyone should know about), but this Saturday is very, very warm and I kinda need to.  Regardless, I still feel a bit of a twat. 

So what we do this evening with Mean is: Mean buys me an ice cream, we walk around a bit, we go to some pub and sit outside, Mean has a beer, I have some water, we walk around a bit more, I go home. 

On Sunday morning, I start texting A Girl nice and early… 

I say (0952): “Yesterday was an OK day, but there was something missing.  I have now come to the bitter realisation that I need at least a daily fix of office death – no wait, life.  If you do go in today, let me know” 

A Girl says (1011): “Normally I would feel the same as you of course, but I only got 3 hours of sleep and I would prefer to sleep all day.  Nevertheless, I will be getting there around noon.  Company much appreciated” 

Then I get dressed (denim shorts – again, I have no imagination this Sunday morning – blue polo shirt, white espadrilles) and catch the tube in. 

I spent the next few hours a) actually working, b) occasionally looking at the packed swimming pool outside the window, c) warning A Girl that if I accidentally fall out of the window and crash head first into the sunbathing deck several floors down, she should tell everyone it was NOT an accident, I’d planned it for months, and they are to blame. 

Then I go to the gym. 

At 1650, A Girl texts: “I’ll be here for another couple of hours, then I may shoot myself.  Or I guess whichever comes first” 

I reply (1700): “I will take it as another cruel joke by the script writers that a cover version of That’s When I Reach For My Revolver by Moby came in my iPod shuffle as I was reading this” 

A Girl replies (1708): “I suppose the fact that as I was reading your last message Morrissex (typo, but I’m leaving it) Dear God Please Help Me was playing on my iPod can’t be part of the script at all” 

By this time I’m home where I spend 97 minutes trying to decide whether I should be Channing Tatum or not.  Answer: Yes.  Yes I should.

23 comments:

michael01 said...

How does one go about doing that (being Channing Tatum)? I'd love to try it myself.

London Preppy said...

michael: I haven't worked that one out yet

Gav Dublin said...

LP,

Did you at some stage inform us as to the ownership of that pool below your office window? Is it possible to go join them someday where you could imagine everyone who remains behind in the office looking out at you and being very annoyed?

Or would that just destroy the plot line for you?

London Preppy said...

gav: I used to go there, before I decided to be pale!

Anonymous said...

You sure do have a great mobile phone contract...
All those text messages.

Gav Dublin said...

Oh yes, how could I forget. In any event it's more fun looking out at them and letting your imagination run wild.

Ps. Don't fall/throw yourself out the window. You would make for a very pale blob indeed!!

Connecticut Yankee said...

Prep -

Purchased Attitude to read your piece. Interesting. You should have had them list you as a contributor, though! I looked for you up front, but no Prep. If they can put the disgusting Edmund White up there (love his writing, but don't read his autobiography if you want to maintain any respect for him), they should put you up there!

London Preppy said...

yankee: Ah well maybe next time!

AlwaysReadySF said...

I hate having to work on weekends. Everything within my body rejects the idea. I get myself physically ill... I fucking hate it. So I completely feel for you. Hopefully it's not something that happens on a regular basis.

So is Channing Tatum the new obsession? What the hell has he done besides Step Up and Step Up 2??

Check this out... Number 10...


http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://i60.photobucket.com/albums/h29/Akagigglegurl/Channing-Tatum-white.jpg&imgrefurl=http://ilovebeautifulmen.wordpress.com/category/uncategorized/&h=478&w=362&sz=30&tbnid=Sd5lXjPocCIJ::&tbnh=129&tbnw=98&prev=/images%3Fq%3DChanning%2BTatum&hl=en&sa=X&oi=image_result&resnum=3&ct=image&cd=1

Although I really don't know what number 14 and 4 are doing on this list!

Have you ever tried spray-on tan? If you take some few steps prior to doing it and you only do it once every 2-3 weeks it's not bad. You get the nice aspect of tanning without any of the side effects.

george said...

now that i am in london will have to have a look at your article. if i could be bothered. so much shopping to be done. be on the alert for a pouncing stabber. you might have to stay indoors for he week. after 23hours of flying and walking all afternoon and night time for bed....george

Graham said...

LP,
I don't think you should become CT. Sure he's hot and successful and all that jazz, but is he happy? Unfortunately yes, I think he probably is and thats not something you want to have to deal with now is it?

dickophile said...

i love channing tatum. i wish everyone could be channing tatum. then the human race might actually matter to me.

Maluminas said...

Yay! Text messages! :D You are both so deliciously ironic, i don't feel the need to eat candy anymore.

I wish i had a friend to text like this. Oh wait i do, but we wont pay 30 cents per text. Welcome to Canada, the world's foremost experts in cellular monopoly!

lol

(am i allowed to say lol?)

Anonymous said...

you should be tom brady instead of channing tatum...

Owen said...

I think I am in love with A Girl. Can you please pass on the message?

Ah, the eternal struggle between 'be' and 'do'. I tend to classify most people I consider interesting into the ones I wanna be and ones I wanna do. But no, Channing Tatum does not fall into either category. Why would you want to be him? Do you mean look like him? I would say you are (arguably) better looking.

London Preppy said...

graham: I have tried a spray on tan yes. But at this moment I think they should do a white paint spray on thing. I'd definitely have that

graham: I guess not...

anon: OK, I'd be him too

owen: Yes, I mean look like him though. He does have that completely expressionless dead face which is quite admirable

seahorse said...

ok, so the place im booked at is in Paros. Is it a nice town/city?
Far from Athens? and the other fing is i been asking around rome about ferry from southern italy to greece as we need to smuggle a friend in wifout visa (no comment)....do u know much about that ferry and is customs on full alert in greece as the italians are completely laid back here....much appreciated..

Dmom said...

LP can you translate?

Ελληνικά

η καρδιά βλέπει αυτό που είναι αόρατο στο μάτι

grea post how much is your phone bill?

Gav Dublin said...

Preppy,

Just an idea but would you consider have a questions and answers post. Readers would be given say, a week, to email you questions and then when you have time you post the questions and answers thereto. Obviously you could forgo the rude or far far to personal ones.(Or don't if you dont mind answering them). Just a thought.

London Preppy said...

seahorse: I love the fact that I'm supposed to have extensive tourist information just at the drop of a hat! I'm from Athens (I've never been to Paros - I couldn't point it out on a map), plus I last lived in Greece when I was 17. How am I supposed to know all these things?

dmom: I'm embarrassed to even type this, but this sentence means: "the heart sees what's invisible to the eye"

gav: I did that a few months ago! I answered about 200 questions over 4-5 posts (it got old quite quickly)

seahorse said...

np...ok ok clipboard wendy! lol
i sorta figured out the lingo and i find a way!
rome to ancona, then ancona to patras, patras to athens, athens to paros! its as long as a flight to sydney i tell ya!! tx

Gav Dublin said...

I do apologise prep. I must search the archives!!

german guy said...

Hey P-dub!

I read an articel about china just the other day, and in this they mentioned something like skin whitener. it is very trendy there at the moment, cuz chinese people have the urge to be pale and not so...
brown- yellowish like they do normally. kind of an beauty trend... maybe you find that moisteurizer or whatever it is...