Monday, 19 May 2008

Tuesday 20/05/08

On Saturday afternoon I meet up with Scott and we go to the shops with a sole purpose: to buy t-shirts, t-shirts that can be ripped them up down the side. So we go to Bershka and Topman and H&M and Zara and the total purchases from these shops are: one green t-shirt with some writing at the front (writing which I can’t remember) to be ripped, two brown wifebeaters from Topman for £10 to be worn at the gym.

Then I go home where I proceed to rip my green t-shirt down the side, like Superman, like the animal that he is and the animal that I want to be. Then I try on the t-shirt and the look refuses to work on me, so I give up. Saying that, I don’t exactly give up all that much, because I will certainly be sporting all my ripped t-shirts at the first opportunity and I don’t care if Superman can do the look better – at the end of the day Superman can do everything better.

On Saturday evening I stay in and I try different designs for my new tattoo, a new tattoo which will be down the left side of my body and it will be an excerpt from a Bret Easton Ellis book. And this excerpt currently stands at 94 words (409 characters) and I’ve chosen to end it mid-sentence, because I like that, I like that a lot.

On Sunday I wake up and I go to the gym and for this trip to the gym I’m wearing: Energie jeans, Timberland deck shoes, pseudo-rugby top from the Gap, ridiculous backpack.




After the gym I meet up Scott and Mean and we go to Apostrophe for hot chocolate and when they serve me the hot chocolate it’s not thick enough so I complain, and then we sit down and we chat Mean informs us that the majority of straight people don’t trim down there, and we are shocked to hear that, in fact we refuse to believe it, and we consider ourselves lucky that we are not straight girls and would have to sleep with that demographic.

Are there any straight blokes or any straight girls reading this who can confirm or dispute this? What percentage of straight boys would you say groom?

Then I catch the tube with Scott to go home and then we argue over something and Scott gets off and goes back to Soho to meet up with Brendan and some others, leaving on me to travel back on my own, which is extremely inconsiderate if you take into account that I haven’t even brought a book with me.

Then I go home where I finish reading An Unquiet Mind (basically the memoir of a manic depressive psychiatrist who was so into it, she would have tried to catch it if she didn’t already have it) and then I start reading Dry by Augusten Burroughs, which is the memoir of some guy who seems a bit like me, only more alcoholic.

Thanks to readers who sent those books by the way.

Then Scott comes over and we watch the movie Renaissance Man and I play him some songs trying to make him like them (The Ting Tings, LCD Soundsystem, Suede), but Scott doesn’t get it, he never has and he never will, and then he goes home.

Finally, and this is a very random request - does anyone know where I can get old indie/'Britpop" band t-shirts? I had a quick look online and can't find what I want. And I want a Suede t-shirt.

40 comments:

seahorse said...

i would try Urban in Kensington high street or your might even be luckier down in Portobella road. Other than that, Camden for sure?

Dick Pics said...

you live such a charmed little life. and you do so while being well dressed. i hate you. i love you, but i hate you. i think i love you more though. (not in that way. im neurotic not insane.)

blueyedboy said...

You could try here...

Nathan said...

T-shirt - I would have though maybe Camden, although I haven't been there since the fire...

Also - maybe it was just the light but your arms look very big and striated and very very pale.

I'm not sure if I like the pale. But I appreciate that you are committed to a 'look'.

James said...

Try Observatory in Greenwich (SE London, not NYC) for the retro t-shirts....

Vicious Debonair said...

Mean has got it all wrong, about 65% of my male friends groom.
Sometimes they get so into it they will make shapes and letters via grooming.

Trybaby said...

Wow that is not acceptable. I would not want to get anywhere near foliage like that. It's just not good grooming/manners.

Wayne said...

Dry by Augusten Burroughs is an amazing book that changed my life. You don't have a drink problem but you'll like the humour, I'm sure.

george said...

can i stab your deck shoes?!?!?! i hate deck shoes like i hate suv's in the city......george

Timmy said...

I am quite curious to find out about straight blokes trimming. Seems that it would be the polite thing to do for their partner. I have a straight triathlete friend who shaves his chest, arms and legs but doesn't trim down there. It's quite odd looking.

Anonymous said...

Define "groom". What's this season's style among the UKgays these days?

Ben said...

I hope my gift in recompense for not being able to find the old football shorts made it's way to you? I know you've already read it, and therefore probably own a copy already, but L'Etranger is the only book I ever buy as a gift for anyone other than family.

James said...

me again - this is the place http://www.theobservatory.co.uk/inform.htm

T said...

Isn't it the Ting Tings?

Good luck trying to order as I think it's a Chinese website, but: http://hk.88db.com/hk/Services/Post_Detail.page/buy_sell/Clothing_Shoes_Accessories/?PostID=132927&lang=en-us

Anonymous said...

just remember as you get older, your physique will change so getting tattoos down the side of your body will look like hell later in life.

Anonymous said...

Speaking as a straight American girl who enjoys quite a bit of variety and is a lover of statistics - I can say that roughly 30% of the men I have been with manscape and only half of those go for a full shave.

Boys! For the love of God - at least mow it down!

Thanks,
Anne
Denver, Colorado / USA

michael01 said...

Are you striving to become massive? Hope not--that look ages badly. Of course...it would give you more "writing surface". You could be a huge version of Ewan MacGregor in "The Pillowbook"-- your epidermis coveted some day by the British Library. When I turned on your blog today, my first thought was: He wants a T made of suede!? Sounds like something from a 70's International Male catalogue! Then I realized what you meant.Lol.

Anonymous said...

ting tings. not tink tinks. fyi,

are you and scott together or not?

Cockbag LLC said...

Oh straight guys shave down there. My fraternity brothers in college made a big deal of it. It may be more of an American thing though (hey most of us are cut down there too).

polislag said...

I've heard similar horror stories about straight men. However, a good friend of mine also forced her boyfriend to shave every hair below the waist for the 4 years they were together so it goes both ways I suppose. Probably based on power relationships, amount of hair, color of hair, etc.

Anonymous said...

Christ! Enough of the Brett Easton Ellis fixation! Frankly it's embarrassing. Can't you think of anything original to tattoo yourself with??

Ben said...

I want to know the answer to the straight question too. I suspect that it is more complec than straight or gay, wild or in control, as a lot of guys down my gym are groomed, and I would not say they are all batting for the team!

Maybe someone could do a dissertation on it. Can you imagine the scene:

Tutor: So then, Jonny, what are you going to research for your final year dissertation?

Student: I am really intrested in the relationship between sexuality and pubic topiary, so I was going to study the links between the two.

Tutor: [Shuffles uncomfortably] Ahhh.... [rubs chin] So.... How exactly does this fit in to the academic world?

Anyone want to volunteer to be the student?

Anonymous said...

Its seems like more and more American straight guys REALLY trim "down there"--like, shave it all off. At least, I've seen evidence of this at my gym (in Los Angeles). LP, what are your trimming suggestions?

--Joe

S said...

It depends on the straight guy. My brother keeps everything cleaned up because he requires that of the ladies he hooks up with. He says "I like a clean playing field and I return the favor." Chivalrous, don't you think?

London Preppy said...

seahorse: Cheers

dick: I don't know about charmed...but thanks!

blueyed: Thanks...no Suede though :-(

nathan: Camden seems the place to go then...

As for the pale, yes the light has a lot to do with it

james: Cool, thanks

vicious: I can't wait to see M spelt in Mean's crotch!

London Preppy said...

trybaby: See, girls just don't care

wayne: I'm really liking it so far!

george: I like both!

timmy: And the question is...how do you know this? ;-)

anon: I don't mean anything extreme. Just not completely out of control

London Preppy said...

ben: Thank you very much for this, I don't actually own a copy :-)

james: Ah cool, thanks, we like specifics

t: Yep, thanks for spotting, corrected now. Hmmm..that's quite difficult to browse

anon: Good point, might have to be more towards the back

anne: Nice, thanks for the first hand account. And I'm glad you agree!

London Preppy said...

michael: No, not striving to get much bigger. As for the writing, yes somebody has already mentioned Ewan to me in real life!

anon: Cheers, as I mentioned corrected

cockbag: Yep, maybe it's more of an American thing then

polislag: And again, confirmed. American thing innit

anon: I haven't come up with any original thoughts in the past 28 years and I'm not about to start now

ben: There is definitely some research required. There is a HUGE demand blatantly

joe: I wouldn't say there are any rules for me really, just some kind of taking care of it is fine!

AlwaysReadySF said...

Out of the straight friends that I either (a) simply know but have seen naked (b) haven't seen naked but would be close enough to talk about such topics or (c) have slept with I would say that, disgracefully, the majority does NOT shave/manscape or really does anything about THAT area.

I do think the practice is a lot more common among the highly urban late 20's/mid 30's SINGLE metrosexual or gay-vague men.

semistraight said...

Oh well...admittedly I don't groom (very occasionally I will do some trimming - but a complete shave is too much of a "plucked chicken" look to me). I consider hair removal an excessively time-consuming task and I'm quite happy about the little hair I have.

Might consider shaving for a partner but then again, one could just as well have him/her do the work in this case ;).

Graham said...

LP,
I know a few straight guys who trim, but that was on my advice and they've all gotten positive feedback and so have been spreading the word. I think for the most part though, straight guys haven't got a clue.

Judging from the guys in my gym (almost exclusively straight(almost) but young), trimming is something that many guys could do with discovering :)

Graham said...

LP,
well done, Greece are in the final!! ;)

London Preppy said...

graham: Oh I'm watching! Why am I nearly crying?

NGM said...

LP,
most aussie straight guys groom downstairs, there was a great convo on Big Brother (so i am told) to other night amongst all the guys on the best way to remove hair from your balls. (no demos however)
can i just be on the record as saying, going all the way downstairs is freaky, some hair is good.
lets have a look at the gree shirt please.

Graham said...

Well LP, at least you didn't enter a turkey, but then I guess given the situation in Cypress that just wouldn't be something Greece would do.

Of course, I'll still be watching on saturday.

Eliz said...

If you like stalking writers, this this might interest you:
search for Augusten Burroughs

Sounds fun, and I'd do if I didn't live 50 million miles away.

Anonymous said...

All my straight male friends (Montreal, Canada) shaved down there. A oddly large number of them even like having it completely bare.

Bale

Anon said...

I have only met one that trimed a bit - not that I noticed except I caught him in the act.

The rest have never even thought about it and I have seen quite a few bits.

London Preppy said...

To the anon who just sent the link: Thanks very much

Anonymous said...

http://www.8ball.co.uk/

http://www.retroclobber.co.uk/

https://www.tshirtgrill.com/?page=shop/browse&category_id=9d258cf0c871f26b9ad6ec9e59fd75fe&ps_session=63312c5192f2faca5196d7e3f5252579