Monday, 12 May 2008

Tuesday 13/05/08

On Sunday morning I wake up. 

Waking up is not a good start to any day, so I suppose I’m already fucked. 

Considering that unfortunately I don’t have a lover who pays me, even though I would very much like one so I can just sit at home and write, and yes, this is an open invitation for offers, I get ready and I meet up with Scott and we go to the gym. 

On Sunday it’s very warm and sunny, which means that the gym is empty, and at this empty gym we do arms and abs and then we go to Hyde Park to hang out with Donnell, Brendan and a wider group of 8, maybe 12, maybe 55 of their friends, some of which I’ve never seen before, some of which I see occasionally and one of which I’d like to see tied up in my cellar. 

When we enter the park I am wearing this: 


When we enter the park Scott is wearing this:

When we find out friends and sit down with them (in the bloody sun), we change into this:

And a picture may be worth a thousand words, but sometimes a thousand words just aren’t enough, so here’s some more.  

I am wearing grey knee-length shorts from Bershka, red Duffer belt, navy long-sleeved hoodie from Fred Perry, white socks from H&M, white Puma trainers, my gym top spread over the only exposed part of my body, i.e. my calves, dark sunglasses from ___, red Abercrombie & Fitch baseball cap.  Scott is wearing a pair of Speedos. 

During this afternoon in Hyde Park: 

- everyone is getting a tan / I am not getting a tan

- everyone is obsessing about steroidy Brazilian prostitutes who are walking past / I am only obsessing about myself

- Brendan tell me that he’s looking forward to reading in the blog how I’ve slagged off everyone for wanting to get a tan / I insist that I have no intention of slagging off everyone for wanting to get a tan, I just want to continue my one-man-versus-the-world campaign in favour of glowing white skin 

On the way out of the park Scott and Donnell attempt to take the piss out of me for my current obsession, but I take no offence – I am too busy admiring the outfits in this picture below, I consider them for myself.

Then Scott and Donnell come to mine, then we have dinner, then we take these pictures of me and Scott stood next to each other to compare our skin tones…



…then I have a bath and I ask Scott and Donnell to come in the bathroom for a bit so we can recreate the scene in Friends where Chandler is having a bath and everyone else comes in and Ross and Rachel announce they’re having a baby girl and everyone jokes about the bubble positioning in Chandler’s bath…


…and then everyone goes home and presumably sleeps.

36 comments:

Dick Pics said...

so that's why scott is in there while you take a bath? no other reason? and what is he doing anyway?

on a side note, while i used to think that scott was "the butch one" i.e. "the top" after seeing these pictures i realize he is a flaming queen. well maybe not flaming. more like flickering. you on the other hand seem to be taking to your role as "albino thug" quite nicely. now just let your pants hang a bit lower, get a gat, make scott your bitch, and you're all set!

Matt said...

I love the life you create in your writing. I love its insanity and this insanity is made even better by photographic evidence.

Tim in Italy said...

You're turning into Timmon of Athens; all you need now is the cave.

Considering you do find someone who will pay you to stay home and write... and who would ever think of doing such a thing!!??... what's to keep you from turning into a total shut-in, aside from the fact that your market always screws up your delivery orders?

GREAT bath tub, by the way. You could sit in there all day and write, like Jean-Paul Marat.

Alex said...

I love the picture-tours of your daily doings. Hopefully if we could fastforward to your present we could see you and Scott in a 'lover's reunited' embrace..

But if not? Oh, well. C'est la vie.

..btw: I was reading some of your archives and saw the BLR Contest-- did the lucky winner ever get to sleep with you?

Graham said...

I want to see you wearing one of those fetching outfits. Just your eyes showing, it would be like that picture you posted up a while ago.

kim said...

so did Scott score with the big guy in the yellow shirt? he looks like he wants to eat Scott for breakfast.

London Preppy said...

dick: Yes, that's why him and Donnell are in there, purely. I can't comment on what he's doing though

matt: Yes, it's like a documentary really

tim: Was Timmon muscly as well though? Cause if so I think I might have liked him

alex: No, he's a bit too far away

graham: Ha ha, you're right I hadn't thought of that

kim: There was definitely some interaction...

The Neighbors Will Hear said...

You should have switched shorts with Scott in those skin-tone pictures. I can't help noticing that you're not as white as your shorts. Plus, the white would have accentuated his tan, and the dark would have accentuated your paleness.

Ilovedick said...

so how hot is it? Why not go to beach.I think it is a good place for summy and it is my fovourite place because summy hoilday i go with myself. I can complet naked and feel it is free but i will not do on my friend LOL.Honestly,In now AU is very cold i may be decided next moth go to snow camp with my friend But when i read you blog i feel is really warn.However it is very nice lifestyle.

Anonymous said...

are you with scott or not?
this is uber confusing.

if youre not with him, then why see him every day?

Richard said...

Hahaha, I love that scene.

semistraight said...

I love the red bar in the mirror, like it was there naturally ;). By the way, did you consider the health implications of total sun avoidance? (i.e. those girls in the burqas probably have to take vitamin d supplements)

Trybaby said...

I'd be careful about that gang of ninjas.....

michael01 said...

What tim in italy isn't telling you, though, is that Marat was stabbed to death in his bath.
Hope you picked up the water soluble vitamin D.
Why do I want to mother you???

Oldyeller said...

Funny. Of course, the only problem with your pallid proclivities is that you aren't able to show off your muscily bod in the park, although I have a feeling that if you had wanted to tan you would have exhibited a bit more propriety than Scott--the gold aussiebums would have stayed at home. But I have to say that even with the pallor, you still have better definition than Scott.

Ben said...

I love it! I abso-fuckin-lutely love it! What more can I say? :-D

The anti binge tan statement is just ace! LP covered from head to toe, and Scotty in his trunks. Just. Ace!

Bedouin Boy said...

While I suppose your affinity with the ladies in burqas makes perfect London Preppy sense, I could never have imagined this turn to dressing in Islamic drag, even from you. The burning question: Since you will be covered head to toe, will we at least be allowed to see your eyes?

London Preppy said...

the neighbors: Damn that's a great idea. I do need an artistic director at all times it seems

ilove: There's no beach in London

anon: Things aren't as black/white as that always unfortunately

semi: I bought my vitamin D pills today!

trybaby: Do you think that's what they were? They did look quite suspicious

London Preppy said...

michael: As mentioned two comments above, yes I did buy them after your recommendation! So thanks

oldy: That's actually a point I wanted to talk about. I kinda feel good about myself that I didn't feel the need to take my top off to "show off" to whatever hot guys that were there

ben: Nice one, thanks!

bedouin: Hmm...I suppose that could work

To the reader who guessed my name: I couldn't publish the comment, even though you're not right, it's kinda close

ApparentlyHasNoLife said...

That's cool- I still feel totally awesome about that achievement. Well, whatever's not awesomeness is shame- but that's ignorable.

Trybaby said...

I pretty sure that's what they are. I think that you are going to have to learn some Kung Fu or Karate. I mean it seems like your neighborhood is turning sour so you need some self defense. Honestly learning self defense is really empowering, I'd suggest you take some. :D

Anonymous said...

LP what's the deal with the wheelchairs next to the burqas?

London Preppy said...

anon who said I make them laugh: Thanks! But I didn't publish cause you started with my name :-)

anon: I don't know actually, I hadn't noticed them before

dimitri said...

is there some contest to guess your real name?

its like an open secret, right?

anyone with 2 mins can pretty much look/find/guess what it is. and
being greek, i suppose that gives me a bit of an advantage in knowing your full greek name is... not that im going to guess, because i wouldnt expect you to acknowledge its your real name. i wouldnt anyway.

Kwake said...

Dude your ridiculousness is adorable.

AlwaysReadySF said...

"and one of which I’d like to see tied up in my cellar"....

that cellar is getting pretty crowded! Are you sure you could satisfy all those insatiable men down there, all by yourself? ;-)

LA_mkup said...

Does Scott still persue modeling? I came across both of your mm profiles. I know yours is deleted but still shows up on Scotts page. I've said it before but you so resemble Shia Lebouf, no one else has ever said that?

Jon C said...

What happened to the London Preppy Videos site?

timbo said...

You don't need a lover to pay you to write -- you need a publisher. You're quite talented and very entertaining. From what I can see, you seem to be the total package: humor, charm, looks, youth, talent and both a unique perspective and the will to do the work. Not to be all self-helpy, but please believe in yourself and realize that you needn't rely on others. You can make enough money from what you do so well that others should be coming to you for support!

London Preppy said...

dimitri: The main reason I will not write my name on the blog is that if I did, it would come up on google searches of my name

always: Definitely, we don't need to worry about that

la_mkup: No, he doesn't either. I remember the Shia Lebouf comparison, but I like to think I don't have such a stupid moon face ;-)

jon: I deleted it

timbo: On this Wednesday morning at 0835, I would very much like to believe all this, so I can call work and tell them I'm not coming in, I'm never coming in :-(

Neil said...

Scott looks old and dried up. He needs a lot of moisturizer. You need to sever the ties for what he did and move on. You deserve a better accessory.

george said...

scott looks very sexy from behind....maybe it is the pic. good composition or something.....are you still counting down to sydney?......george

London Preppy said...

neil + george: There we have it, two very different views from the same pictures. I do like the accessory comment though!

Nix said...

The fourth photo - of ladies in burqas - is pure gold. How I wish I saw that in real life.

BTW, those ladies must be so pale.

Anonymous said...

It's pretty offensive to photograph muslim women (or anyone for that matter) without their knowledge and then post it on an adult-oriented blog. Can you imagine the distress this would cause them?
A bit of sensitivity wouldn't go astray...

London Preppy said...

anon: This is not an adult oriented blog