Thursday, 8 May 2008

Thursday 08/05/08

And here are some more reviews of ridiculous songs that I like (like I did here and here) and this time the songs are: 

Chris Isaak – Wicked Game (click for youtube link)

From Chris Isaak’s spectacular recording career and his unsurpassed output of worldwide number 1 hits spanning three decades, this particular song occupies a special place in my (rotten) heart.  Well actually, I think this is the only Chris Isaak song anyone has ever heard on this planet, with the exception of his ex girlfriend who spent several sleepless nights with Chris lying next to her, strumming his bloody guitar trying to come up with a second song.  One early Tuesday morning in May 1997 she snapped, pulled her earplugs out, started screaming: shut up Chris; shut the fuck up, it will never happen again, it was just a fluke.  And walked out. 

Anyway, from what I can gather (and I’m no expert) Wicked Game describes the following sequence of events: Chris Isaak falls in love with some person.  Some person turns Chris Isaak down.  Chris Isaak loses faith in love and decides to never open his heart to anyone again.  Is this a look that chicks dig?  I can’t be sure.  But Chris thinks so.

The key line of the song comes right in the end, as Chris warbles: “nobody loves no one”.  I think this is possibly a bit over the top even by Chris Isaak’s miserable standards, but I don’t know, maybe Chris met Scott at some point and drew the inspiration for this lyric, so fair play to him. 

Jewel – You Were Meant For Me (click for youtube link)

In this song Jewel has just gone through a messy break up.  In fact, it was so messy, that she had to leave town.  You might have thought she had other things going on in her life apart from some teenage ‘he loves me, he loves me not’ bullshit love affair, but who am I to judge?  Nobody. 

Anyway, we now find Jewel in her brand new place, making breakfast (eggs and pancakes with maple syrup no less), drinking coffee, reading newspapers, watching movies, reading books, etc.  Quite frankly I don’t know what the fuck her problem is and she has to moan so much; she’s at home doing stuff anyone would enjoy, she does not mention going to work once in the whole song, I guess some people just like to complain. 

Fair enough, she may not be connected to the internet yet (she has just moved in), so she can’t go on bigmuscle.com and find a rebound shag, but surely there has to be an internet café just down the road.

Robin the Frog – Halfway Down the Stairs (click for youtube link)

This is a song from the Muppet Show, as performed by a little frog called Robin, who (wikipedia tells me) posed as Kermit’s nephew in later episodes.  I don’t really care for children’s shows and neither do I have an interest in talking about what I used to watch when I was six like many English boys in their late 20s like to do in a faux-ironic way trying to find things in common with new acquaintances.  In fact it really irritates me.  

Regardless, this is a song that stands out thanks to a combination of: a) a ridiculously heartfelt delivery that should never have come from a little amphibian puppet, b) tragic lyrics that were written with a half-empty bottle of Valium in hand and c) a heartbreaking video where Robin is carefully placed – you guessed it – halfway down the stairs. 

In fact, I like this song so much that I’m willing to claim that it’s the best song ever performed by a lifeless puppet – even though I do have a soft spot for Love At First Sight by Kylie Minogue as well. 

Robin tells us that “all sorts of funny thoughts run round my head”, his step “isn’t really anywhere, it’s somewhere else instead” and “I’m not at the bottom, I’m not at the top, so this is the step where I always stop”.  

I don’t know what existential angst is because I’m stupid, but if I were to make a video about it, I’d use this as the soundtrack.

27 comments:

Trybaby said...

I see you took down the posts where you showed your eyes and bulge amongst other eyes and bulges. Or am I just imagining this happened?

fleetmonkey said...

Jewels stuff is so full of angst because a good chunk of it was written while she was living in her car in Alaska or somewhere else thats really depressingly cold unless your staying in a 5 Star Hotel or Log Cabin at which point it becomes romantic.

Thanks for this post LP reminded me of a lot of music I don't get round to listening to anymore. Around about the same time as Jewel you could find the wallflowers http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HfBsf1lYOr0

and if you want to go full on angst

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tj7aNPWbvgo - Mansun - Wide Open Space - lots of meaning in the video.

Dick Pics said...

so even though the whole post was genius and i didn't stop laughing, the chris isaak part was the best. anyway, are you trying to tell us something with that bit about big muscle?

London Preppy said...

trybaby: Yes, those are gone. It seemed right for them not to be there anymore

fleetmonkey: Hey, thanks for reminding me the Wallflowers! I'll go download their one good song.

As for Mansun, fortunately or unfortunately, I have every album and single they've ever released...

dick: Unfortunately, no I'm not. Even though I'd love to. I seem to be attracted to people who are out of bounds, mainly because most of them are straight. So it's not that easy for me

Anonymous said...

i think that the very happy chris isaak is going to be in the adaption of "The informers"

London Preppy said...

anon: That film is looking up by the minute!

Trybaby said...

Oh I changed your wiki entry under photographs.

London Preppy said...

trybaby: Eek, nice!

Dick Pics said...

"straight" is just a state of mind that can be easily changed. i say until he calls the cops and gets a restraining order you throw yourself at whoever it is relentlessly. though you're probably already doing that.

London Preppy said...

dick: Yeah, that's why I like to think.

I'll post the story about who I'm talking about tomorrow

Dmom said...

Well that post was ok, good song and pretty funny.

AlwaysReadySF said...

Now I can't wait to hear about this story. I hope it is a story that involves stalking (on your part) and a lot of uncomfortable (on his side) sexual tension (on h with a hot straight guy.
FUN!

London Preppy said...

always: That's not too far off the truth

AlwaysReadySF said...

Thought so ;-)

Anonymous said...

We always want the people who do not want us - we all torment ourselves - trick is to want the people who want us too , I think it is called growing up !

You will get over this

Happy is the Little Stone said...

Not that I watched Sesame Street when I was six years old, but the “ridiculously heartfelt delivery” and “tragic lyrics” are not so surprising when you consider Robin’s family life and his own Uncle Kermit’s struggle with his green oriented lifestyle as was captured in his hit tune, Bein’ Green: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DbCI68eSNsA

billybudd said...

I'm sad for you. Well, by that I mean sad for myself, because I have to dump someone too. But we aren't talking about that, now, aren't we.

What happy songs. I use them to cheer myself up. Especially the Jewel song. It reminds me of where I grew up, clandestinely jerking off on a tractor to the Backstreet Boys while working.

But we aren't talking about that either.

James said...

"Halfway down the stairs" is a poem by A.A.Milne and you could hardly find something more "English boys when they were six" except that it's from his book "When We Were Very Young" rather than the later "Now We Are Six".

London Preppy said...

anon: Well I do like some people who want me too, but the majority of people are straight, so I'm bound to like some that will never like me back. But as A Girl pointed out: is anyone really straight? And the answer is yes

happy: Hm...I found it hard to sit through this. Now if Robin had sung it...

billy: On a tractor? :-)

London Preppy said...

james: I did see that it's a poem, it explains a lot

Rico said...

That part about Chris Isaak meeting Scott almost made me wet my pants I was laughing so hard!

You've really mastered the art of sprinkling just the teeny-tiniest glimpses of that (rotten) heart in your posts.

London Preppy said...

rico: Thank you! This is a real honour :-)

Anonymous said...

I agree some people are REALLY straight............no one can change, coerce, entice anyone to be anything that they are not or anything they do not really want to be.

Looks like you are trying to funnel your "Scott" frustration through tormenting yourself with "straight guy" - why not just take a break from it all?

george said...

the all time best muppet song is "THE RAINBOW CONNECTION" !!!!!!.....george

george said...

the all time best muppet song is "THE RAINBOW CONNECTION" !!!!!!.....george

dimitri said...

this may also be applicable

Extreme's More Than Words
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kt7L4X4li_k

dear god, did i love that song when it came out!

Ilovedick said...

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