Friday, 2 May 2008

Friday 02/05/08

On Wednesday lunchtime I meet Mean and we play out and Mean tells me a story from the gym where he goes, which is quite a gay gym even though Mean tells us that he’s straight and the story is: Mean is walking around and somebody has left an open can of something on the floor and Mean accidentally kicks it and spills it on the floor without noticing and then he hears somebody saying in a gay tone (according to Mean – I take no responsibility for this story – especially as the person might be reading this) “Idiot”.

Then Mean turns around and says “You fucking what”, because Mean actually thinks that he’s young and he’s black and his hat’s real low and not just in the comedy way that I do. Then they argue a bit more on a normal level I guess and then they walk away.

This isn’t enough for Mean though who feels like a real man this evening and he proceeds to stare at the guy for the next five minutes, which is followed by a lull for ten minutes, which is followed by Mean walking past the guy and saying “You wanna watch yourself mate”, then the guy says “What?” and then Mean…

…does the gesture where you run your finger across your neck, the gesture that implies you’re going to slit somebody’s throat.

I really don’t know whether sometimes people just do completely ridiculous things like that, just to give me something to write in the blog.

In the afternoon, back in the office, some woman who’s Polish, maybe Romanian (Czech?) is back from a holiday in Poland, maybe Romania (Czechia?) and she’s brought some chocolates in, chocolates I would usually refrain from but I decide to give her a chance, I suppose she had to fight the military dictatorship or whatever it is that they have over there to get them across the border, so I have three.

Later in the evening I watch the Apprentice just to see people humiliate themselves by having completely the wrong priorities in life in order to make myself feel better for having none and then I go to bed.

On Thursday it’s London Mayor election day so at lunchtime I meet up with Mean and I ask Mean who are you going to vote for and Mean says XXX and the poof. (you vote for first and second choice). Then he says, who are you going to vote for and I say YYY and the poof. So even though we’re voting for opposite people and we could well not turn up because we’re going to cancel each other’s votes anyway, we decide that we really should turn up and vote because we’re both voting for the poof as a second choice and we could still make a difference.

Then I go back to building were I play the role of “office worker” every Monday to Friday from 0930 to 1730 and then I go to the gym.

After the gym I go and vote for YYY and the poof and for this voting event, I’m wearing khaki shorts from Ralph Lauren, a navy t-shirt from Abercrombie and Fitch and brown Timberland deck shoes.

Then I go back home and watch Frasier and then Scott comes and we hang out and then he leaves and then I go to bed.

If you haven’t seen it already, have a look at the London Preppy wikipedia entry (as written by Trybaby), you better hurry up before it gets pulled down. Why the fuck not/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/London_Preppy

32 comments:

fisher(r)ing said...

The gym story is excellent. I love it when gay guys go gangsta. I am guilty of similar behavior: At a bar once a straight guy called me a faggot, so I got in his face and told him I was going to show him a true gay bashing. It didn't come to blows - less because of my toughness (which I am not) but more because I think I just confused the guy into passivity.

The Wiki entry is surreal. I only go to wiki to look up diseases and world capitals...but there you are. Well done.

Greg Turner said...

What with the blonde hair and the general foppery, I'm just going to assume you went with Boris. As any person wanting several years of high-level entertainment would.

AlwaysReadySF said...

Wow that took quite the dedication to put that thing together on Wikipedia... I am impressed.

So, Scott is coming around a lot still. Are you "working things out"? Or is it just habit?

Dick Pics said...

Mean is quite gangsta. Maybe you should get into a fight. By the way, who are you gonna kill. To be a true gangsta you must kill someone. Or at least get shot nine times.

Rogue said...

To think I used to respect wikipedia.

London Preppy said...

fisher: I'd like to reminf everyone that Mean is straight. So basically you could take this story as an example of severe bigotry and homophobic bullying (hi Mean)

greg: I couldn't possibly say (mainly because I'm clueless about politics and I couldn't defend my vote). Isn't it great how every idiot has the right to vote?

always: I know you're only asking from friendly interest, but I'd rather not answer any questions on Scott at the moment - just to write what I can every now and then on the blog

dick: I'll kill someone tonight, just for you

rogue: Really? Wikipedia? The most notorious source of inaccurate information and made up bullshit? Tsk tsk tsk Rogue!

Rogue said...

Well true but at least the bullshit was interesting. Speaks volumes about the entry concerning your good self!

Michael said...

What, no picture of the shorts/shirt/deck shoes? I see how it is....

Jay said...

I love the entry on Wikipedia. The throat slit is classic!

You certainly know how to make a Midwest boy smile!

J

Oldyeller said...

LP: Just curious if you could guesstimate what percentage of the fellows (who workout with weights) in the gyms you most frequent are gay or suspected of being special? I know it varies from area to area in London, but I wondered what mean's "quite a gay gym" means, to coin a phrase.

Jim said...

I think it's a bit daunting to see your entire life (excuse me, entire imaginary life) summed up so neat and tidy on Wikipedia.

It is a lovely tribute to this blog and you can direct people to it when you kill this alternate version of yourself known as "London Preppy".

jay said...

I now fully expect Mean and this guy to hook up now, even though Mean says he's straight. Let the mating ritual begin.

fisher(r)ing said...

In that case, the gym story is even more excellent. Nothing like severe bigotry and homophobic bullying. I often prefer it to being given flowers.

timbo said...

Good for Mean! I would have done the same thing actually...except maybe the throat-slicing bit. It is efficiently succinct though, so...I think I like him quite a bit.

London Preppy said...

rogue: I don't understand

michael: I should have, shouldn't it? Well I thought this is an outfit that's gonna be worn A LOT over the summer so I'll defo get a chance

jay: Very good - I'm glad to make Midwest boys smile

oldy: I'd say the gym where Mean goes has 80% gays at the weights

jim: Excellent point - complete imaginary life!

jay: Ball on Mean's court!

timbo: The throat slit clinched it. What a guy

Trybaby said...

Well Mean is quite the special boy isn't he? Knock over someone's drink and doesn't say sorry and then goes as far (WAY TOO FAR) as to give him the "you're dead throat slit" gesture. Wow....

Hmm about the entry. I'd say that it has a good chance of being destroyed by the erasure team that work at wiki. But to be fair I've seen a lot of other pages less worked on, so who knows. I'm not clear on what you mean by "Why the fuck not?".

London Preppy said...

trybaby: "Why the fuck not" go and have a look at it (while it's still up)

Greg Turner said...

Fair enough, LP. Though the idiots having a right to a vote did get a tad bothersome over here in the US when Bush ran for re-election.

Back to real LP topics-- I just bought a Hickey Freeman suit you'd adore. It's not preppy so much as the Suit That Gave Birth To Preppy. Sweet.

Anonymous said...

maybe you can do this vid too?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MICoKmKNl5U

george said...

love the wiki entry...well done trybaby.....as for mean he sounds like your typical bogan male...you'd probably call them chav? maybe you should lean mean scotts dagger....you still have it don't you? don't give it back. keep it you deserve it!!!! .....george

se said...

Oh God, Prep, I know Poland is small and democracy is still young here, and we have stupid politicians, and so on, but your 'dictatorship' remark was so... American.

Mike said...

Trybaby: I have to say the LP wik page is absolutely, hilariously, brilliant. It says megabits of our info age. Also, as a side, your comments a few post back “retardly friendly” and “jumping the shark” were spot on. Keen insight, keep your hat real low.

London Preppy said...

greg: Picture please!

anon: Somebody needs to tell me what that song is. SOMEBODY NEEDS TO TELL ME please

London Preppy said...

george: Mean doesn't need a dagger - he has his bare hands

Trybaby said...

Why do hot guys like that have to be so stupid and not me? Sigh.... and the song is "Thug Luv"(feat. 2Pac) by BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY

Greg Turner said...

This thing is awesome-- I'm working on some insolent stances so I can show it off to best effect:

http://fromthelibraryof.blogspot.com/2008/05/oh-la-la.html

Alas, not me wearing it.

kim said...

which is quite a gay gym even though Mean tells us that he’s straight

i think we need to hear more about this ... or a photo to put us off the trail.

London Preppy said...

kim: Come on then Mean, give us a picture for the blog

timbo said...

The song is Thug Luv by Bone Thugs n Harmony w/ Tupac. Wish I didn't know that.

London Preppy said...

Obviously I've downloaded the song now

Mean said...

Several points:

The 'throat slit' threat was a bit excessive..I think lactic acid does something to my brain. Apart from that I think my actions were totally acceptable...what kind of 'idiot' leaves an open can on a gym floor?

As for the gym itself, particularly prevalent are : Aussie Bums, Brazilians on the phone to 'friends' andsteroid freaks doing that odd bouncing dance thing to whatever funky house shit they're playing at a ridiculous volume. Also, the gym in question is just south of the river but has a geographically inaccurate name.

Anonymous said...

Oh help us -lactic acid is now responsible for death threats...............please!!!

LP: you look hot on wikipedia