Friday, 7 March 2008

Friday 07/03/08

Oh yeah and here's the penultimate part of answering your questions. 

128) What is your favorite memory from your childhood? 

I don’t keep any memories (it’s better that way – I would only want to go back and change everything) and very occasionally when one sneaks its way back in, I take some pills and lie down. 

129) If you were forced to move to the USA but could not live on either coast, what metropolitan area would you choose? (Advice from A Girl allowed) 

A Girl tells us that the answer to that has to be Chicago.  She gives sensible reasons for that, but let’s ignore those, I just want to focus on her last statement, which is: I honestly can’t think of any other metropolitan city not on the west or east coast that I could stand to live in. 

130) What personality trait do you most admire in others? 

I like quiet people who don’t say much, they just stand there, clutching a bottle of gin, a glare in their eyes, looking in my direction but way past me, lost in a thought that I’ll never know, a thought I suspect I’m not worthy of knowing anyway. 

131) Apropos the decision to change your name: did that reflect wanting to adopt something of your new lifestyle, or a demonstrative rejection of something specific in your old lifestyle? (And could you tell us what?) 

The name change is not a big statement either way.  In fact, I think everyone should change their name – it’s something you’re given without being asked, why wouldn’t you go and find something out there you like better and adopt that?  People change their hair if they don’t like it, they even have plastic surgery to change their face, but no, it’s weird when you change the random sequence of letters that people refer to you by.  I don’t get it. 

132) Do you think now you’ve ‘fully come out’; or do you see ‘coming out as a life-long process’? 

I’d say it’s a lifelong process, I still get a little nervous when I meet new people and such a question comes up.  I.e. “So do you have a girlfriend”? 

133) If Guillain Barre Syndrome made you cynical, what disease or syndrome could reverse that? 

I don’t like the word cynical, it implies I’m trying too hard to appear jaded.  Anyway, there’s no way back now; I’m not complaining though, I like this much better, can you imagine what it must be like to be positive and extroverted?   

134) What three or four words need to come out of Scott's mouth to absolutely infuriate you? 

Don’t know.  Something about my chest or abs.  Accompanied by an action / touch.  In the gym changing rooms. 

135) What's your favorite fruit and it can't be Scott. 

I like most fruit but I don’t eat it because it’s quite acidic and not good for your teeth.  I like cherries but I would not even consider putting one in my mouth because they’re very red and colour your teeth.  So in the non-acidic, non-colouring fruit category we have bananas (which I hate but still eat) and melons (which I like and also eat). 

136) Multiple part question. Please name your favourite:

a) Jelly flavour

b) Soup

c) Motorway

d) Film

a) I don’t eat jelly.  Do they do chocolate jelly?  Chocolate.

b) I don’t eat soup.  I can’t even make up a flavour, I have no clue.

c) The motorway in the Saint Etienne song Like a Motorway: She said her life was like a motorway, dull, grey and long, ‘til he came along.

d) I don’t watch films.

137) Fave animal? Have you had any pets? 

Reindeer.  I don’t like to interact with animals though.  I’ve never had a pet.

138) What is your one favorite thing about men?  Women?

Men: masculinity.  Women: They’re shorter than me (well, some of them).

139) When was the last time you had butterflies in your stomach?

I can’t remember.  That’s a feeling I hate though – it means something hasn’t gone according to plan.

140) What percentage pay increase would you require to leave Tesco for Waitrose?

About 250-300%.

141) Who is your hero and why? 

I have too good an understanding of people to idolise anyone. 

142) Do you really believe in monogamy? 


143) Why are you so into preppy? / Why Preppy? 

I have to point out again that I’m not particularly fussed about the true, original sense of preppy (i.e. geeky restrained private school kids from conservative families), but how preppy filters through to popular culture.  You know how in every teen movie or TV show you’ve got the cliché of the underdog who’s ignored / tormented by the popular kids (usually jocks or preppies) until he finally emerges a winner?  Well I always find myself rooting for the popular kids and I don’t understand why I have to feel for the underdog.  And why he has to win in the end. 

144) Does color matter? (well, I HAD to ask) 

Colour of what?  Are you referring to race?  And if so, in what sense? 

145) What would you do if you had 10 Million Pounds to spend?  With the following catch: 

a) You need to spend it in 6 days

b) You can't put more than a million in the bank (including equity/fixed income)

c) You can't buy any movable or immovable property

d)  You can't gift it to your family and/or Scott 

Plastic surgery, clothes, a Hummer, another Hummer, some watches, a boat (does that count as movable property?) the most expensive sound system you can get.  I like this game a lot, please send the money through.

146) Have you ever kicked somebody's ass in a fight?

I’ve never been in a fight.  I’m small and not strong so I don’t think it’s wise.  If I were a big lad I’d get into fights all the time.  In fact, it’s probably a god thing I’m not, because I’d be a right bully. 

147) What conditions do I have to fulfill to get you to move in with me? 

You have to have a nice flat in Sydney or London, big enough so I can have my own space and think I live alone.  Install Greek TV too and I’m there. 

148) Three wishes? 

Money.  Book published.  Immense physical beauty. 

149) What do you think about the environment? 

Don’t give no shit. 

150) Would you sacrifice yourself to save the world? / Who/What would you die for? 

Ha, good one. 

151) Kids? Boy? Girl? What if your kid was straight EWW!! 

Twin boys followed by girl.  All straight please.  Why would I want my kids to go all through the gay shit?  

The boys, called Stark (middle name Winter) and Parke (pronounced Park, middle name Buddy) are tall and good looking and athletic (I have no idea how with me as the Father, they just are).  The girl (called Smith or James) is two years younger, she’s blonde and pretty and sociable.  When the boys are 17, Parke gets in a fight with some guy (D) who’s been too forward with Smith.  It’s late at night, there’s no one around, the boys have gone to up to D’s house to confront him, everyone’s been drinking, things get a bit out of hand, Parke strikes a fatal blow.  It takes a lot of money to put this behind us, but it doesn’t matter – we’re rich.


Seth said...

As a West Coaster, I have some suggestions for middle-American cities I think you'd like. If you ever visit or live in them, I think you'd be surprised. I'm sure other readers who have never lived or visited some of these will be incredulous, but trust me--I know what I'm talking about. Not in any particular order:

New Orleans
and yes, Chicago

London Preppy said...

seth: You're not the Seth I know, are you?

Trybaby said...

Lol I hope you enjoyed my "special" list of questions I've given you. Frankly I'm surprised you bothered to answer so many of them.

That's a fair point about not having your kids go through the torment of being gay but then again I think society is getting better and kids are coming out earlier and earlier. Hopefully we are going to move into a kind of post gay society where people don't care that you are queer and that it doesn't have to be the biggest part of your identity. I'm sure if I had a kid that was straight I'd come around and be like "fiinnnne I guess I still love you.........maybe".

On the name thing I don't think it's weird at all. I'm kinda surprised that people on here do find it weird. In my experience if you have a big group of queer friends I'm sure at least one of them has changed their names. Maybe that's just a Vancouver thing, especially with lesbians and trans people I find. And when you hang out with those people it's kinda fun, you can tell them to call you by a different name and there is no resistance. One time I told people that I wanted them to call me Oprah. It was pretty great, they even did it when I wasn't there and they were talking about me. Also don't people have friends whom which you call by a nick name most of the time? What's the difference?

Lol you squandered one of your wishes. If you have enough money you can get what ever you want published. Or alternatively if your book was published because it was just that great then you would rake in loads of dough from the sales. Maybe you should have wished you wrote "The Secret" lols.

Lol and what a bad gay you are for not being environmental, all the cool kids are doing it!

McKenzie said...

That very last bit was so Dynasty/Dallas/90210/The OC

I can't believe no one suggested Kansas City! It's like Chicago only full of quiet polite people.

London Preppy said...

mckenzie: I liked writing the last bit. I've loved answering the questions, but I've also missed writing my stories. But just one more day of Q&A left!

Jon C said...

I'm traveling to Kansas City every week now and it is nothing like Chicago.

Move to Australia. Then I can come stalk you there.

Marcus said...

Well, reading you this week has absolutely worn me out. While I have enjoyed your answers to the questions, I really hope you can get back to something more shallow next week. I think you should force yourself to write under the influence of Valium for a week for your amusement and ours.

London Preppy said...

trybaby: Damn I knew I would slip with one of the hopes/wishes one day. Please try to ignore that I might have any aspirations

jon: Fine then, I'll do that

marcus: This week has been kinda odd for me too, even though they questions were fun and I wanted to answer them all, I have to admit I enjoy writing my rubbish more

McKenzie said...

Jon C.

You just don't know of the right places to go.

London Preppy said...

mckenzie & jon: Fight! Fight! Fight!

Matt said...

Re: 129, the city question
My immediate reaction was you should have picked Atlanta, which is definitely the preppiest non-coastal city, but then I remembered your love of the cold, and then I remembered this paragraph from Freddy & Fredricka by Mark Helprin:
"...the house shuddering both as he danced and at the behest of the navy blue wind that came off the lake and froze solid anything unheated by flame or glow. If you looked north, before your eyelids iced over you could follow a line that stretched in the dusk across the solid white top of Lake Michigan, the rock-cold Canadian ground, and the Arctic ice, a line that, without tarrying in a single firelit domain, stretched all the way to the pole itself. The city's parlours, offices, and institutions, its banks, kindergartens, and intimate restaurants, its libraries, bedrooms and all the rest, were the first wall against which broke the snowy wave of polar winter that knew nothing but the black of starlit space and an ocean of tundra covered in a death shroud of white."
So, yeah, Chicago would probably be best for you.

Dick Pics said...

you're so right. fuck the underdog! they're always so annoying. and ugly. why would i want them to win? unless its so the pretty people are so depressed they need me to console them by engaging in various kinky and possibly degrading sexual acts. yeah. that could work.

Jon C said...

Me in a fight is probably the last thing you'll ever see. And if you do see it, then you better be watching carefully, because it'll be over quickly.