Tuesday, 26 February 2008

Tuesday 26/02/08

So here’s a game that we’ll play: you can send me a question and I’ll answer it.  Like an interview or something.  I don’t know why you’d want to interview me (I write enough unprompted), but I’d like to see what you might ask.  And your questions can concern anything – general knowledge, my view on something, what I do, what I think, whatever you want.  And I’ll answer all questions I receive, apart from the ones that I won’t.  

This is not an original idea of course, many other bloggers have done it, but I don’t want to be original, I want to fit in and I want to be like everyone else (regardless of whether I slip sometimes) you should know that by now. 

So please leave a comment with your question, or email me (london.preppy@gmail.com) over the next few days.  I’ll collect all the questions and answer that at the weekend.  Can everyone participate please, I want loads. 

Apart from that, you may remember a story I wrote not so long ago, about this “street artist” in his late 30s, who stands on an empty box of bananas dressed as a Roman soldier and makes his respectable living begging passers by for loose change.  If you didn’t read that story please go back and have a look here; there are pictures too you’ll like it.

So anyway, on Monday on my way back home I’m on the tube and I shamelessly pick up a free newspaper and start glancing through it.  (Quite frankly I need a break from Kafka's claustrophobic terror stories).  And I see a story in there about this very person and this very person has apparently been picked up by the Royal Opera House and he’s’ playing the role of the executioner in the brand new production of Richard Strauss’ Salome.   

The story tells us that bodybuilder DM (allegedly aged 35 – in the same way that I am 17), was spotted performing as a half-naked Roman centurion in Covent Garden by leading director DMcV.  The director said: “I thought that he had just the right body for the part.  But he also had the ability to move well and particularly importantly, to stand still, which is necessary for the role of the executioner”.  

Now apart from the obvious fact that this director sounds like some cruisy queen who trawls the streets of London in search of impressionable younger (and older, much older) muscle boys… 

…for fuck’s sake, Salome is a performance I really, really wanted to see and now I want to see it even more.  Unfortunately it’s completely sold out.  I don’t want to see it for DM’s naked arse in it, but surely that’s an added incentive.  Now if you had a spare ticket you’d be doing me a big favour.  I’m not willing to pay of course. 

Here’s a picture of DM in Salome (with his gigantic arse)

Apart from seeing the story myself, a couple more people have mentioned it to me.  First, a reader emails me today copying me the article (because he remembered me having written about the guy) and he also gives us the following information: 

-       My boyfriend actually knows this guy, kinda

-       They used to work together for a short time at a well-known sports supplement store (___)

-       Sometimes they worked out together

-       He's a bit weird and he lives in a hotel apparently 

The second person who mentions the story to me is Orville.  And Orville sends me a text and says: “Why can’t you get cast as the executioner? You hang around Covent Garden enough”.  When I point out that a) I am 1/3 of the size of DM and my presence on stage might be a tad underwhelming not to mention that I can’t stand still for very long (which appears to be the main casting criterion), Orville says that he doesn’t know about the size, but he has definitely seen me stand still for long periods of time, in fact even when I wanted to move I couldn’t.  I don’t know what this might refer to.

26 comments:

r!ch said...

Not to mention you can't sing either. Or can you? I've heard some muscle marys hit some very high notes just in general conversation. Oh, not that you're a muscle mary or anything...

London Preppy said...

r!ch: I don't think he has a singing part!

r!ch said...

Of course, doh! (hanging my head in shame)

...that pic is a bit of a mind fuck (Alison Jackson style) as it looks like Madonna kissing the head of Tony Blair in a bloody opera about my least favourite bible story.
I'll just keep away from the lsd and everything will be fine :)

Drying out said...

if i had to die, naked executioners of the wrong kind (/like that) would make me freeze

NGM said...

i have two questions, hope this is ok

1)how much of your self worth is dependant on how you perceive others view your body/ over all looks? i.e. if you were fat and ugly do you think you would be a) more psychologically stable b) less psychologically stable c) about the same.
discuss.

and now for a deeper question...

2) do you like to top or bottom more?

Marcus said...

Here's my question:

When you are perving on someone you are obsessed with at the gym, what's your favorite exercise/machine and body part to watch him work on ?

London Preppy said...

NOTE TO EVERYONE: I will not answer to the questions here today of course, I'm saving them all and will answer all at once. Keep sending them

drying out: I guess that's a good thing - you'd be less conscious?

Frontier Psychiatrist said...

You may have answered this before, but what's your favorite book not by Bret Easton Ellis or Lisa Birnbach?

Andre said...

My question(s): If you could choose, in which way would you like to die? And if you were a serial killer, what kind of mask / signature weapon would you use?

(I served you this one on a silver plate, didn't I?)

html said...

I have three questions:

1. Assuming that you are still half serious about going to Sydney, is 'Scott' going with you?

2. What is your actual job title?

3. What is your star sign? Just curious if you are an Aries and if I (a fellow 19 y.o Arian) will grow up to be just like you - a hot, neurotic, valium popping Ellis fan (though the last book wasn't so good).

Jamie111111 said...

My questions are multiple choice, because I know that you will be annoyed by the restriction in creativity of answer that this brings but I think you need that discipline.

1 Sack and crack; are they
a- both smooth?
b- both hairy?
c- one of each?

2 How would you prefer it all to end? (choose the closest one to your preference)
a- marriage and children (adopted or surrogate)
b- marriage and a nice garden to keep
c- a single life at 60, in too small shorts and vest perving at fit lads at the gym
d- the future is not somewhere I choose to dwell thank you.

3 Are you free for dinner sometime?
a- yes, whenever
b- yes, come round to mine after Gym and I will cook something low carb
c- yes, and stay for breakfast too

r!ch said...

Andre, don't encourage it! (But I like your question very much, good choice.)

Tom Cat from Bondi Beach said...

My question is :

Are you out to your parent/s &/or sibling/s ??

DAMO said...

yo london preppy!
sorry this has nothing to do wi yer post, but did u just feel an earthquake as my room has just spun!!! and i heard it has been felt in london too!
just as i clicked on ur profile, the friggin room statrs shakin!!!!!!!!!! it was spooky!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

J said...

Ever had a gym stalker? Any good ideas of how I can get rid of mine? .. and thank you and your blog for giving me a complete complex, almost to the extent BEE can.

franck said...

And on Wednesday night I try very hard to think of a general knowledge question to ask London Preppy, and I come up with the following:

What is the Celsius equivalent of 82 Fahrenheit?

Ben said...

Since more than one question seems to be de rigueur:

1. How is it possible for someone who shops at Tesco because Waitrose is too expensive, to spend nine hundred pounds on a bag?

2. Multiple part question. Please name your favourite:
a) Jelly flavour
b) Soup
c) Motorway
d) Film

3. What is the stupidest question you have received in response to this request (apart from mine)?

London Preppy said...

damo: I did miss this "earthquake"

hotntight1 said...

since its kinda obvious that you're a big ol' muscle bottom, what is your favorite position to get pounded?

a)on your back, heels to heaven and your prayer that the pounding won't ever stop
b)on your stomach, biting the pillow in feigned pain yet screaming silently "HARDER!"
c)on your side getting poked from every angle possible and some impossible ones
d)sitting on the guy's rock hard penis bouncing as hard and fast as you can 'cause you just can't get it hard enough, fast enough or deep enough
e)on all fours, arse arched up and open while growling and barking like the bitch in heat you really are

Philip Pirrip said...

i've got a couple of questions....

we've read about your coming out to andrews, so when did he come out to you? did you live together for six years, both gay, and both thinking that the other was straight?

and how about scott? does he get on well with the lads?

lastly, do you have any secret dream or ambition which you haven't shared with us in this forum?

that's all thanks.

Graham said...

My questions are:

If you believed in reincarnation, and you had to choose an animal to return for your next life, what animal would you be an why?

What minor physical quality do you find most gets your attention on guys?

If you were to be really famous (like much more than you are now), what would you want to be famous for?

Do you give to charity? Why/why not?

What is your favourite item of clothing right now that you own? What one item would you love to own?

Bobby Vanquish said...

We know that there are muscles and good clothes. And you say you and Scott are steady and you're looking forward to Sydney and you read a lot and listen to good (bar the Fox) music etc.
According to Maslow, your hierarchy of needs is fulfilled but of course no life is ever complete.

So, thinking about your life, what do you think is missing in it?

(Material objects are not allowed to count in this answer. Thanks.)

billybudd said...

Questions:

How do you remain dedicated to your workout? I'm looking for inspiration.

What do you get out of blogging?

How much of what you say is objectively true?

On second thought, nah. Don't answer that last one.

London Preppy said...

TACITO: That's very cool of you (you know what I'm talking about), I might check it out myself - I couldn't ask anyone to do that of course :-)

Thanks for the idea though

Daver said...

With your typical meals consisting of chicken and fish with no sauces or spices and some cut up raw vegetables, do you actually find this satisfying? I can understand how it may fill you up, but do you really enjoy it? Do you like foods with sauces and spices and with lots of flavour? Or do you just eat this meal because you are overly obsessed with your diet/muscle building/maintaining?

What do you drink if you're drinking, Low calorie drinks (vodka soda or liquor straight up), beer, wine, 'girly' drinks, no drinks-just give me drugs?

Have you investigated job opportunities in Australia for yourself or is that an after the fact problem to be dealt with?

What size are your feet?

At the gym do you wear: old clothes (I assume not), athletic clothes made by companies such as Nike, expensive athletic clothes by hugo boss etc., or designer clothes by armani, prada, versace etc., not really designed for the gym.

Do you do cardio at the gym or are you naturally ripped enough/eat zero carbs, so you only do weights, stalk, change and get out of there?

Simon said...

OK, my question: how much of what you write is REALLY your life? Allowing for the odd bit of artistic licence, are we talking 50% real-life stuff?

And another question if I may (and this may well prove to be rhetorical): how are you seemingly so damned perfect?