Tuesday, 19 February 2008

Tuesday 19/02/08

As we all know, my favourite band of all time are The Smiths (and Morrissey), followed by other miserable / self-important artists like Suede, Gene, Bruce Springsteen, Depeche Mode, Jimmy Eat World and several ridiculous / self-important artists like Bjork, Fischerspooner, Tiga, Felix Da Housecat, Daft Punk, etc. 

Very often though, I will also like the ridiculous / ridiculous ones, with no sign of self-importance whatsoever.  In fact, some of my favourite songs of all time have no credibility, but who cares, they’re still fucking ace. 

So here’s a list of 10 of these songs that I well and truly love and I don’t care what anyone finks (in random order). 

1.    Lisa Loeb – Stay (I missed you) 

I prefer an acoustic version of this that exists, but I suppose the original one is OK too.  In this song Lisa Loeb asks her lover to stay (cause she missed him), presumably after throwing some huge tantrum and causing a big fight, which led him to start packing his bags and threatening to move out.  Now Lisa is having second thoughts and she wants him back, so she’s stood there singing this song to him, whilst he’s throwing socks in a suitcase.  I don’t know what happens in the end. 

My favourite point in this song is when Lisa turns the road on, she turns the radio off and hears a song about lovers fighting and one of them threatening to leave – therefore the song on the radio perfectly mirroring her real life experience!  This is an amazing example of life imitating art imitating life imitating art, which is a concept so complex even Lisa who wrote it doesn’t quite comprehend it. 

2.    Roxette – It must have been love / Listen to your heart 

These interchangeable twin ballads can only occupy one place, because let’ face it, who can tell these songs apart.  They are pretty amazing though.  It must have been heart (or Listen to your love) is sang by a painfully Scandinavian blonde woman with a platinum a la garcon haircut, a woman I mistakenly had a crush on in 1991. 

In a pretty radical twist of common songwriting themes, these songs concern lost love – a subject matter that is hugely under-represented in popular music.  I don’t know what my favourite point in these songs is, but it certainly isn’t the annoying guitar solo that occupies the middle section of both. 

3.    Samantha Fox – Touch me 

This is a song that was created to capitalize on Samantha Fox’s immense popularity as a topless model in the late 1980s, but by a complete fluke it is a timeless example of flawless electro pop. 

The urgent, almost out of breath delivery adds to the overall effect, and the lyrics describe Sam as a hungry predator on a night out in town (with or without a top – this is not made clear).  Twenty years later, no one has come up with a better line in popular music than “like a tramp in the night, I was begging for you to treat my body like you wanted to”. 

4.    Foreigner – I want to know what love is 

In this song, the singer from Foreigner wants to know what love is and he wants you to show him.  

When I’m listening to this song, it’s 1987 and I’m a 16-year-old American high school student out on prom night, dancing with the girl I’ve been seeing since I was 13 (we grew up next to each other – our parents have known each other forever) and we both know it’s one of our last nights together: my family is moving, I’m going to a different school, thousands of miles away.  I’m playing in the football team and she’s a cheerleader, we’re not supposed to like this song, we’re too cool for it, but right now it doesn’t matter.  When she gets home later with tears in her eyes, her Mother asks her if she had a good night.  She says yes and shuts herself in her room.  Her Father looks up from the newspaper and jokes about her being upset like this is true love.  Her Mother stares back at him and says: It is true love.  It’s always true love at sixteen.   

5.    Bryan Adam - Heaven (the unplugged version only, NOT the original song) 

In this song, Bryan Adams is lying on the sofa with some girl, they’ve just finished watching Rumour Has It with Jennifer Aniston on TV and he’s thinking about all their younger years.  There was only her and him, they were wild and young and free.  In fact, I’m quite convinced that this song is written as a sequel to “I want to know what love is” (above).  Bryan and his lover (the girl from high school) are now in their early 30s and have finally come together again after all these years.  They’re both married though (to different people), so all they can do is steal some moments of happiness here and there, escaping their mundane working class lives in the arms of each other. 

Tragically, seconds after Bryan sings the “now nothing can take you away from me” line, the girl’s husband bursts after breaking the front door down and shoots Bryan in the head. 

I’ve written too much today, I’ll continue with the songs tomorrow. 

Oh yeah, have a look at this – a reader left a comment pointing me to the direction of this blog site, which only lasted for a few days, but was written as an “homage” (piss-take) of mine.  How weird is that?  I wonder who wrote this, why, with that motivation, why did they stop, how many people have seen it, all these questions. 


Actually, forget this, I’d rather not know any of these answers, it’s just too odd.  Not to mention my fear that it's better and funnier than mine.


London Preppy said...

Bolt upright and Matt from DTB: Thanks very, very much (you both know)

Scott said...

i like londonpreppypreppy!
it made me smile.
jackie collins.

Auctor Ignotus said...

Dead funny homage. No, you are funnier and better because only you are you.

semistraight said...

A couple of days ago I was thinking about the playlists you used to attach to your posts - I miss them (as I only started reading your blog a short time before you got rid of them). Keep those interpretations coming.

Maybe that "metablog" is a sign that you've "made it" in the blogging scene..or something like that ;). Just like tabloids in real life.

firechick said...

Great job "Mike". This post was laugh out loud funny. Both part one and "part 2"

firechick said...

Great job "Mike". This post was laugh out loud funny, both part one and "part two".

Silly Billy said...

Hahaha. Everybody laughs when I tell them I listen to Roxette!

Good choices LP. Good Choices.

BTW - that site is PRETTY funny. Glad you can laugh at it too. :)

j said...

Interesting that the "homage" was from July and just now surfaced.

Off point- were you at Box on Saturday night?

Matt said...

you're welcome!

wow, i'm not sure i'd want somebody to do a parody of my blog. i'd probably get ripped to shreds!

NGM said...

Anyway, on the train to work today, I showed one of the girls I work with my tattoo. She had no idea who Jackie Collins is! - funny stuff, love this guy.

London Preppy said...

firechick: Who's Mike and which are those parts?

Mike said...

Make your top 10 dudes an annual thing. It'd be interesting to see the changes.

Dick Pics said...

that blog was hilarious. but dont worry lp nobody does it better than you. you rock

george said...

that was great you are so lucky....sign of fame when someone does that. the tesco entry was really funny. so you!!!.....love the song choices so far....don't know the lisa loeb song though......keep it coming.....george

Frontier Psychiatrist said...

Nobody does it half as good as you.

Guy Ruben said...

I <3 Morrissey!

J'adore some Samantha Fox- waaay ahead of her time! lol

I'm so getting a Jackie Collins Tattoo!

r!ch said...

An a la garcon haircut will do that to a young gay boy. Sigourney Weaver, Alien, nuff said.

Nice choice of songs as well!
So... you're ok C, not that much of a freak...

London Preppy said...

r!ch: Good to see you taking a break from Fire and coming back online

everyone: Damn that mysterious eloquent blogger. Who is it? WHO?

r!ch said...

Just a short break... giving the other lads a chance...
Fire is a rabbit hole. You been recently? See my pic in qx last week? :)
So many times now and still haven't made the gawd damn cover.

Just seen you're starting to pop up in mutual friend's Facebook pics so thought I'd stop by and checkout the latest greek geek brain diarreah! lol

Timmy said...

I laughed when I read LPP. However, I am wondering why he gave it up. He must have realized that it is work to be LP.

And to reiterate what others have said (ala Carly Simon): "Nobody does it better." There's only 1 LP!

PS I do like the Jackie Collins idea.

London Preppy said...

r!ch: I haven't picked up QX for ages, I'm waiting for you to make the cover. Then I'll know

r!ch said...

...not likely with these ears...

Simon said...

I also mistakenly had a crush on Marie Fredriksson (the "painfully Scandanavian" woman from Roxette you refer to). I think with her short spikey haircut circa 1991, maybe she looked more like a man. I dunno. But you weren't alone anyway.

Actually, I've always had a soft spot for Roxette and I have all - yes, all - their CDs. Don't hold it against me.

I also like the MTV Unplugged version of Bryan Adam's Heaven. Brilliant version of a song that makes me want to puke as the studio version.

Go figure.

London Preppy said...

simon: I like other Roxette songs too...Crash Boom Bang, even Milk and Toast and Honey :-(

Mmm...I think I'll listen to Heaven unplugged now...

Jon C said...

Was Mean or Scott behind the lpp blog?

Tom Cat from Bondi Beach said...

As an alternative to Bryan Adams singing 'Heaven' [which I like] try DJ Sammy but the Acoustic version not the general version.

Usually I prefer to hear men sing [coz I luv men] but Sammy's version really gets me :)

BreadandButter said...

Bring back Samantha Fox!!!

I really like Jimmy Eat World at the minute, Daft Punk reminds me of one skiing holiday, Depeche Mode ("precious") reminds me of another one, maybe the sunniest ever, we were eating game on a sundrenched terrace in the mountains 2 hours from Nice.

Among my other top bands at the minute, All Time Low and Simple Plan

grene said...

I recently came accross your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I dont know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.