Sunday, 24 February 2008

Sunday 23/02/08

So earlier this week I get a message from a reader, a reader who’s been reading this blog for a long time, ever since it was on myspace and this reader says: 

I had been over in America for a few weeks just spending time away from London / trying to track down Britney to help sort her life out etc. So I turned up at LAX […] pitched up in a coffee shop and got my Mac out to make the most of the free WiFi […] I noticed when I walked into the shop this really hot guy also on his laptop. I ended up sitting the row in front of him and slightly to the left, close enough he could see what site I was on but not close enough to read the text on the screen. After getting another coffee he ended up coming over to me and asking about the blog, your blog, that I was reading. He had noticed the banner at the top and recognized the format of the top of the page with your picture. 

His name is T___ and he lives in New York and had been in LA doing some photoshoot for a hair gel company or something. Anyway he heard my accent and knew I was from London, we spoke about the blog for ages and ages - we concluded that we are both big fans etc. He started reading after you had started on the blogger site, he didn't know you were on myspace beforehand. So he has only ever seen pics of you with the red blocks so I showed him your myspace profile and made his day haha. 

And naturally I love this story very much and what I want to do now is find this person we’re talking about.  So if you’re reading T___ please email me ( and don’t worry I won’t give your name out here or anything.  I don’t know why, just email me.  Why not. 

Apart from this, what happens on Friday is that I go to work – not that I can concentrate on anything with an amazing new tattoo appointment looming at 1730 – and after lunchtime on my way back to the office I get in the lift and press the button and… 

…some guy jumps in in the last minute and barks “6th“ at me, treating me like shit, using me just to serve his purpose, reducing me to the role of a lift boy, not saying please or even looking at me, but I’m actually getting a kick out of this, I’m lapping it all up and I don’t expect a thanks in return, because the guy is hot, hotter than anyone even seen in this retched building that I work in. 

So for the next, what is it…8 seconds, I’m glancing at him sideways and in my head he’s looking back at me and he grabs me and forces a kiss on my lips, a kiss that I relish and abhor equally, a kiss that’s leaving me weak in the knees but makes me want to push him away, I’m not just an outlet for his urges, I’m a man damn it, but I know if I lose his kiss, his embrace I’ll fade away, this is vital to me now, there’s nothing I can do anyway, he throws me against the mirror, his hands on 

and then the doors open, we’re on the sixth floor where he gets off, never to be seen again. 

I wrote about the new tattoo on Friday, but here are another two points: 

-       The tattoo guy says to me at some point so you go to the gym then, I says yes, he says how many times a week, I says six, he says oh this tattoo will be losing its shape then.  And I’m not sure how valid a point this is, because it might be quite fine writing on a straight line around my calf, but let’s face it, it’s my calf and my calf is completely unresponsive to weights / exercise / muscle gain.  But we’ll see eh 

-       On the same topic, a reader suggests that maybe I should have another reader competition to give everyone a chance to show off what tattoos they’ve got.  I’m thinking that this is a good idea in theory, but we all remember what happened last time, with the Best Looking Reader competition, where only a handful of people sent real pictures and the rest cut and pasted from the Abercrombie website. 

But then another reader comes up with an even better idea, which I’m willing to go for, mainly because it’s fucking hilarious, and this idea is: 

“the reader tattoo contest should be who can/is willing to get ink done in honour of LP ... that'll sort out the men from the boys” 

That's right, the men from the boys.  I couldn’t have put it better myself so I’ll leave this without comment.  I am waiting though for somebody to send me pictures of London Preppy tattooed on their forehead, my face with a red block tattooed on their arse, something like that anyway.


Trybaby said...

I'll get ink done on the inside of my eyelids so then that way I can see you virtually all day long.

London Preppy said...

trybaby: You'll also have to find a way to provide photographic evidence of this please

Trybaby said...

Hmm that's pretty tough. Maybe I'll just have the ink done on the outside and if I want to see it I'll shine a flashlight in my face with my eyes closed. Seems logical, as most brilliant ideas do.

Auctor Ignotus said...

Regarding tattoo guy comment on shapely calf muscles: Every muscle will respond if it's worked, some more than others even if you think they aren't changing, they will dramatically if you put on weight. Calf muscles get bigger from daily use not so much from gym episodes (according my my licensed and degreed trainer).

So if you put on 20 pounds of muscle (somewhere) the calf muscles will grow. Look at heavy people who have lost a lot of weight. They have huge calf muscles. Moo.

Bolt Upright said...

I can't commit to a permanent tattoo, but I want to play along and am willing to have a logo and even perhaps Chinese characters tramp stamped with marker pen on me. Maybe Davey Z. Li can translate "PENETRATE ME DEEPLY" for me. But it has to be a quite literal translation - nothing vague or vulgar.

London Preppy: how many days did it take for "VIOLENCE" to wear off?

nylon said...

Great kissing fantasy, reminds me of Howard/Dominique from the Fountainhead. Hot!

semistraight said...

For a more toned down approach I suggest an inner lip tattoo. You can just flap it around when you feel like it, and the rest of the time you can go undercover ;).

London Preppy said...

auctor: Now the question is how do I put on 20 pounds of muscle on! Maybe steroids eh? But I'll save that for when I'm old and desperate - UNLIKE EVERYONE ELSE I HANG OUT WITH WHO'S DOING IT NOW, NAMING NO NAMES!

bolt: This is something I would like to see. Yes please. The violence stayed with me about 4-5 days. With moderate showering

nylon: Very good, thanks!

semistraight: Cool, also acceptable, I can't imagine how much that might hurt though

London Preppy said...

alex: You mentioned my name, that's why I didn't post the comment!

Trybaby said...

To get that extra weight you could wear a really heavy belt.

NGM said...

re the tattoo comp, if you wanted to make sure readers pic's are real ask them to post there pics with a print out of your blog in the same pic.
and if you want to get in the mood for oz, check out, cool pic's from bondi every day.

davey z. li said...

bolt upright, i unfortunately don't know the translation of 'PENETRATE ME DEEPLY' into chinese, most likely because day-to-day conversations with my parents in chinese have never involved that phrase (yet). although you could have a classy and elegant 'SEX ME UP BIG BOY' which translates to '性别给我的大男孩' and don't ask me how i learnt that phrase: it's a tragic story.

London Preppy said...

ngm: Yes, this could work, might do that in the end

davey: Excellent, now that we've got this sorted we're all waiting for bolt to submit his pictures

Timmy said...

hmmm...I would like to enter the tattoo competition. however, I have a really big arse and I don't think there is enough red ink in Houston to do a rectangle on my arse.

Alex said...

Oops. See i may have two degrees, a fantastically witty humour and pretentiousness to rival your own but i still have blonde moments.

Ahh *You* I have missed your blogs you know. They keep me going through the cold english nights. They are, in short, my life force.