Thursday, 25 October 2007

Thursday 25/10/07

So this is what we’re going to do. We’re going to have a competition for the Best Looking Reader (BLR) of the London Preppy blog. (This competition will be referred to as BLR 2007 from now on). This is obviously a very prestigious award, up there with the Nobel Prize for Peace, the Smash Hits Readers Poll Most Fanciable Male and the Grammy for Best Country Performance By A Duo Or Group With Vocals.

How this is going to work is that you’ll send in some pictures of yourself, the small panel of judges - comprising me, Pam (aka Fuzzy Logic) and American Girl - will come up with a shortlist, and finally we’re going to have a public vote to decide a final winner.

Here is some information on the Rules, some Disclaimers and of course the Prizes:


- All blog readers are eligible to enter this competition

- All blog readers that I DON’T KNOW IN REAL LIFE that is. This means that we are looking for new talent and not the usual idiots that I see every day, like Scott, Donnell, Mean etc. According to the recent poll, I only know 6% people who read this blog anyway, so we’re not eliminating too many contestants

- The competition is open to both male and female readers, but if you actually are a female reader I wouldn’t bother. Nah, only joking, it’s all about equal opportunities at BLR 2007

- You must send at least a couple of pictures if yourself (I guess as proof that it’s really you), not just a fake picture of a random guy you found on Sean Cody and wish you looked like. This isn’t myspace

- Ideally we would have a picture of your face and one body shot. Please lose the shirt

- To enter, please send your pictures to I said, OK?


1) I understand that I don’t show my face on here, so I think it’s only fair that I don’t expect you to either. You can either send your pictures with an already placed red block across your eyes (London Preppy™) or alternatively, don’t worry, I will do the red square myself if I choose to publish your pictures. Please note: only use a red square, we will not accept blurs, yellow dots, black circles or anything else.

Please only cover your eyes with the red block, we need to see some of your face. Don’t try to cover your potato nose if you have one, I’ll be able to tell. Now if you think your strength are your eyes and you’re not doing yourself justice by covering those, I don’t know, cover your ears and show your eyes, cover your forehead and show your teeth, you’ll figure something out, you’re not dumb. According to the poll so far half the people reading this have a PhD (ahem!)

Of course if you have no problem with showing your face, please point it out and I won't cover your natural beauty with stupid red blocks, it's up to you.

2) Yes I know this is very stupid and shallow, but it’s also fun so take it elsewhere Einstein


a) The winner gets to sleep with me.

As I realize that this is not something the average person would really go for, you can turn that down if you win, it’s up to you. We also have:

b) A personal tribute to you written by me.

This will take the form of the usual write up I do (for example the post with the England rugby players and the Princes drinking, every Josh Lewsey reference I’ve ever made, the post with the things on my desk), i.e. it will be affectionate and funny. Also, the tribute will be posted on a Monday when I get the most people visiting (about 1,300 at the moment = instant fame). If this is still not enough, we also have:

c) £10 is hard cold cash, sent to you via paypal

So there you have it, 3 amazing prizes you can’t say no to. You can have all 3 or choose the ones you want. Now, send your pictures to Closing date for entries is Saturday 10th November 2359 UK time.

PS. You shouldn’t hesitate to send your pictures for fear that I might take the piss, of course I won’t. I may be hollow but I’m nice. And making fun is not the point of this of course, if I wanted to do that I’d open the London Lite and respond to some of the readers’ letters.

PPS. Muscly, red-haired/ginger contestants with flawless white skin are particularly encouraged.


Tim in Italy said...

A couple of catagories would have been nice. Like over 40, under 40. Something. Obviously there's no way a well kept but harried executive like me is going to be able to go head to head (so to speak) wth a young buck like Tyler AND he'll bring you brownies.

Can the judge be bribed? I'm just looking for options here.

Trybaby said...

Wow what a scary prospect to be judged by you. I might just have to enter!

tyler said...

will we get extra points if we have a huge penis but have a potato nose?

London Preppy said...

tim: I must stress that the committee will take a wide range of criteria into consideration, so everyone has a chance. Also, to make things fairer the committee now has 3 members and not just me!

trybaby: Well, not judged by me exclusively

tyler: Please keep your penis under wraps for the time being, surely that's a whole different competition!

Jon C said...

What a great way to get hundreds of pictures of guys sent to you. :)

London Preppy said...

jon: Yep, if ANYONE enters!

Wyler said...

If you insist on the shirts-off picture, that can be arranged, but I will have to request the use of the red rectangle over the abs. You see, I’ve only just started the London Preppy Diet (When will that be out in paperback, btw?) and I get the part about Krispy Kreams but I'm confused about the no carb thing.

tyler said...

so it's no weiners AND no eyeballs?
got that.
timmy, though he doesn't know me too well....KNOWS me too well: i will indeed bribe you with dozens of scharffen-berger bittersweet chocolate brownies with dutch process chocolate whipped cream.
as far as winning the top prize of making the beast with two backs with you: we have been engaged since i knew about HEAVENLY a few weeks back, huh? and i don't want
my prospective wife sleeping with another dude or now what?

London Preppy said...

wyler: Just suck it in and send the pics ;-)

tyler: Actually - and I'll edit the post about this - if contestants want they can show full frontal (face) and not block their eyes. Up to them

As for the other issue, well I suppose you just must win then!

seahorse said...

ooh i got a 10 point lead already with my strawberry blonde locks.. yippppee! haha

now that its appreciated i think i will revert back to orginal color quickly.

DJ said...

This new competition is a classic! Seeing as though I know you I can't enter, but look forward to seeing the winning entries. If you need another judge I'm happy to help out. ;o) Also what's with your attraction to white skin?


London Preppy said...

D: I dunno! I like them pasty boys ha ha

tyler said...

i also like red heads like prince harry: translucent skin with the blue veins showing...yum....
and many times these rosen people have freckles on their willies: double yum.....

Timmy said...

I might have to read the rules again but did you state when the picture had to be taken? Also, will you be able to tell if they have been PhotoShopped? Maybe I should stop typing...I'm giving away all of my tactics! (j/k)

daze said...

oh jesus, i think this might work well - shouldn't the readers get to vote, at least on a final few?

democracy is lovely.

DanNaked said...

I sleep with my eyes closed. Were I to win, could I pretend to sleep and then look at you sleeping next to me? Would you be sleeping in the nude? Could I take advantage of you (i.e., suck or fuck) as I see fit while I pretend to be asleep? I just want to be completely clear about the prize before making the effort to enter.

London Preppy said...

timmy: As long as the picture was taken at some point in the last 35 years I'm happy. Also you can photoshop anything you like!

daze: As i've written in the post: "...and finally we’re going to have a public vote to decide a final winner". London Preppy is a democracy with a Sovereign, just like the UK. Only I am the King

dannaked: The winner can spend the 8 allocated "sleeping" hours any way they like. Personally, I will wear my earplugs and put my head under the pillow

seahorse said...

so if the winner is from states it could be quite costly one would think? lol
start hunting for cheap flights if you confident enough!

seahorse said...

OK i'm sick at home till Monday and have nothing better to do.
So i've been running a bath and decided to take pictures...hmmm
As i flexed my arm i realized..
Does 1 freckle or 2 count as flawless?

chabang said...

....just to clarify it would ONLY be your head under the pillow?

seahorse said...

And if by way of equal opportunities and a democratic they do on X Factor, a female should do you plan on spending them 8 hours in bed with 'her'...talking about barbie dolls and cup cakes? Or will your head still be covered under the pillow nevertheless. With earplugs ofcourse.

Trevor said...

So ultimately, we get to choose someone who we want you to sleep with...

I guess you're hoping for more than 3 entries...

London Preppy said...

chabang: Yes, just head. The rest will be exposed. Well maybe dressed actually

trevor: I guess do! And definitely hoping for more than 3 entries!

dit said...

what if we have a potato nosed penis and a carrot like nose?