Tuesday, 11 September 2007

Tuesday 11/09/07

I take the tube back home and I’m reading one of the crappy free newspapers and I see that they have an interview with Martin Johnson. I don’t expect you to know who Martin Johnson is, so let me tell you that he’s an England rugby player that used to be in the team that won England the Rugby World Cup four years ago by fluke (just like Greece won Euro 2004, but I should stop talking about sport because I’ve lost all of you by now I’m sure), and now he’s retired.

And here’s a picture of Martin Johnson.

So I read the Martin Johnson interview not because he’s hot or because I have an interest in him (he’s not and I don’t), but because who knows, he might mention Josh Lewsey or Ben Cohen or something. And as I read I realize how full of clichés it is and how it’s difficult to believe anything that he actually says.

Just like every sportsman in the history of the world ever being interviewed, he tries to go for a clean cut/masculine/I hang out with the lads but I take my job very seriously/I better not say anything controversial because kids look up to me-type of image. So they all come across boring as fuck and a bit thick.

So Martin Johnson lets us know that:

- he prefers nights in to nights out
- he likes beer and wine but it’s a cup of tea most of the time
- he’s a big steak and chips man but he loves his fruit and veg too
- he listens to rock music from 1982
- he travels on public transport just like the rest of us

As I read this I get a bit nauseous from al the testosterone surrounding Martin, but then I think that maybe I’m being a bit harsh and it’s actually very difficult to be honest or interesting or controversial in any kind of interview.

And I go back home and look at the interview I gave to AXM in the September issue and I realize I must also come across as full of shit and completely insincere, and trying to live up to an image.

Martin Johnson wants to be the only 6’7”, 119kg (262lbs) rugby player in the world who likes to stay at home in the evenings knitting and I want to be the only naked, seemingly amoral ripped guy on a magazine cover who’s very introverted.

But then I read my interview more carefully and it occurs to me that actually everything I say is true and I’m not comfortable with the idea of being there naked and yes, I am quite shy and I don’t like to have my clothes off and I don’t even stand naked in the changing room in the gym, instead I dry myself and put on my underwear in the shower cubicle and then walk back and wear the rest of my clothes.

So maybe Martin Johnson is being honest too and he does prefer a cup of tea to 16 pints of lager and I’m just being a judgmental twat.

And here are a couple more pictures of Ben Cohen and Josh Lewsey so that we don’t forget that some people should never be shy and are better off permanently naked.

I have 1 song by Cars and I’ve played it 68 times
I have 5 songs by Carter USM and I’ve played them 22 times
I have 7 songs by Cassius and I’ve played them 45 times


tyler said...

sports dudes indeed have a rep to uphold whether that be in merry olde england or here in the us of a. and that goes for ALL athletes starting here in middle chool all the way up to professional sports and beyond. I know this becaue until a year ago when I started Grad school I was a pretty good futbol player; having played since i was bout 2 years old. (btw: I do not get bored with sports talk at all, ever). I am attending school to eventually become a sports psychologist...so i am around "them" daily. My mentor at school is the sports psych for my colege and i help him with some of his clients (read patients) and believe me athletes suffer from the same ills that we all do...and a number of them are also secretly gay which is sad i think...always hiding, always being afraid of being found out or being beat up, whatever.
i have to admit that it takes every fiber of my ethical being not to reach out and literally touch some of these guys but i cannot and so i just nod my head and commiserate.

London Preppy said...

tyler: Being trapped in a career that seems more pointless every day I would actually love to have studied phychology instead. Particularly sports psychology sounds so interesting, I can't begin to describe. I only realised I wanted to work within sport too late though and my only experience was writing my MSc Marketign dissertation on sports marketing

tyler said...

so what's keeping you from doing it now?
i mean, you're in your mid 20's: it is def not too late.
what's not kosher is your doing something in which you feel trapped.

London Preppy said...

tyler: Obviously you have a point. It will get to the point where I will HAVE to do something. Cheers

tyler said...

i will shut my big trap and step down from my high horse now. sorry for stating the obvious.

tyler said...

hey lp:
i hope it's kosher with you that i have included your blog in my "blogs i read."

Bobby Vanquish said...

I completely changed my career at 26. it's difficult and scary but if it's what you wanna do...
So sort yourself out.

London Preppy said...

tyler: Of course, thanks

bobby: You'll have to tell me a bit more about that maybe

Knight said...

"You gotta love what you're doing coz you're gonna be doing it forever." That's what people always says.. which is somewhat true.. BUT sometimes, the grass is always greener at the other side.. so you may not like what you're doing now, but even if you switch careers.. you may not necessarily like the new one coz you're never satisfied. It's a matter of contentment I guess.

chabang said...

actually i know Martin Johnson (and several of the other non-pritty world cup squad members) //end gratuitous name drop// and i can tell you that actually he IS that boring and dull in real life. Thoroughly nice bloke but you do sense he'd probably have been the worlds tallest accountant or bank manager if he hadn't discovered rugby.

London Preppy said...

chabang: You seem to have lots of stories. Belgian family entertainers, English rugby players...Email me ALL OF THEM

chabang said...

there's not a big enough email inbox :-p

This christmas i'm working on a number of panto's so i'll finally have some decent z-list uk celeb gossip and scandle to be shocked by.