On Thursday night I can’t sleep again and I take a pill, possibly for the sixth time in the last two weeks. I don’t know where this is going to end really, surely you must reach a point where you’re so tired you can actually have a proper night’s sleep. I’ll have to wait and see.
I text Donnell – who’s a doctor – about this and he writes back: “Sleeping pills are for party nights only. You will become dependent on them and not be able to sleep without them. Lecture over”. I tell him I know but I’m in a bad cycle right now and I need them, but I’m gonna sort it out this weekend. I.e. the plan is to not take anything at all even if I’m lying there at 0500, wide awake staring at the ceiling.
I go to work on Friday and it’s not bad and I stay on for a bit afterwards and chat to people. But then I’m too tired to go to the gym, so I come straight home.
This week I’m feeling: tired, bored, disappointed.
After yesterday’s kinda heavy post, I thought I’d lighten up a bit and poke some fun (at myself). So here’s an overview of the 4 glorious magazine covers I’ve been on in my life so far, with some bloody hilarious commentary.
*Please note that neither are the magazine covers glorious, nor is the commentary hilarious.
Cover No.1: Boyz June 2006
I text Donnell – who’s a doctor – about this and he writes back: “Sleeping pills are for party nights only. You will become dependent on them and not be able to sleep without them. Lecture over”. I tell him I know but I’m in a bad cycle right now and I need them, but I’m gonna sort it out this weekend. I.e. the plan is to not take anything at all even if I’m lying there at 0500, wide awake staring at the ceiling.
I go to work on Friday and it’s not bad and I stay on for a bit afterwards and chat to people. But then I’m too tired to go to the gym, so I come straight home.
This week I’m feeling: tired, bored, disappointed.
After yesterday’s kinda heavy post, I thought I’d lighten up a bit and poke some fun (at myself). So here’s an overview of the 4 glorious magazine covers I’ve been on in my life so far, with some bloody hilarious commentary.
*Please note that neither are the magazine covers glorious, nor is the commentary hilarious.
Cover No.1: Boyz June 2006
I got a message on gaydar from the photographer. He was looking for a couple to shoot for the Europride cover in June 06. We said OK. The concept is that we are traveling to London to attend Europride. Personally, if I were traveling anywhere I would be inclined to wear a top.
Good things about this cover:
- I still have my hospital hairdo (i.e. shaved no.2 all over) and I don’t really look like me, so not many people recognize me from it
Bad things about this cover:
- We are wearing rucksacks with European flags pinned on them. Read this statement again. Do I need to say any more?
- We were told to look excited. I can’t look convincingly excited even when I am. I would certainly not look excited about traveling to Europride in London
- Look at the backdrop
“Interesting” fact about this cover:
- I am standing on 10 back issues of Empire magazine to appear the same height as Scott
Cover No.2: QX October 2006
We did a shoot with a photographer we really like in April 2006. Somehow it ended up on the cover of QX a few months later.
Good things about this cover:
- I actually like this picture. There’s enough airbrushing to make us look good
- I was asked to look angry which is an effortless look for me
Bad things about this cover:
- The picture was taken very soon after I recovered from Guillain Barre Syndrome and I’m still quite thin / unfit
- The S&M gear kinda forbids from showing it to close family
- The shape of my head looks as bit like an egg
“Interesting” fact about this cover:
- I am wearing the same jeans as on the Boyz cover
Cover No.3: AXM January 2007
A few guys were doing this shoot to promote a cable music channel (which has now closed). I take no responsibility. I bet the videos they were playing were crap
Good things about this cover:
- This is a proper, national magazine that you go in shops everywhere in the UK and buy. Not a London-specific gay scene one
- It has my actual name on it printed on the cover right there. I like that cause I’m not just a naked guy jumping in the air with a stupid smile. I’m a naked guy jumping in the air with a stupid smile, whose name you know
Bad things about this cover:
- I don’t look muscly at all cause I’m mid-air
- I look a bit retarded because I’m trying to a) smile, b) jump, c) hold the pose. This is too much to combine for somebody as talentless as me
- Because of the high exposure this led to notoriety in the workplace, but we are not allowed to talk about that
“Interesting” fact about this cover:
- I got to keep the pants
Cover No.4: QX June 2007
I did a shoot back in February with a different photographer I really like and somehow this ended up on the cover of QX a few months later
Good things about this cover:
- This is my favourite picture out of all of these
- I look sufficiently melancholic so it’s representative
- I have dirt on me (always a plus)
Bad things about this cover:
- I don’t know really, I kinda like it
“Interesting” fact about this cover:
- I did not get to keep the pants
I have 1 song by Albano & Romina Power and I’ve played it 7 times
I have 4 songs by Alcazar and I’ve played them 41 times
I have 1 song by Alenka Gotar and I’ve played it 5 times
9 comments:
Aw dude, you sound depressed -- as opposed to merely melancholic -- you're anxious, you're not sleeping, you're disillusioned/disappointed to such a degree you don't care about things you used to, you don't have the energy to do the things you want to do. It's not good to give unsolicited advice but if this doesn't get any better, perhaps you should see a mental health professional. That's not to say you're "mad" or have some terrible stigmatising disability -- but whatever's bothering you is clearly affecting your day-to-day functioning, and needs to be addressed.
On the positive side, after the hell of your near-death experience you're looking fabulous! To have a cut six-pack like that right after having laid in hospital for so long is pretty damn impressive. You must have brightened up that hospital ward...
Nah, I'm not depressed mate. Remember, I exaggerate events and feelings for the blog.
It is true that I don't care about most things in the way I used to but I'm sure that's to be expected after such events
Besides, if you want to really get cheered up, all you really need to do is ring up that guy who offered you, what was it 6,800 pounds to spend the weekend in his London hotel room with him? Then you can sell your used underwear on eBay, and if you film the whole weekend, you could post the video on the Internet for a subscription fee, and never have to work again!
Well, I completely disagree!
The last one is boring, though well photographed!
The second one is probably by the same photographer, again good in terms of photography and the first is well what is says on the tin lol
BUT...............................................The AXM is the best ever! Just because it has sooooo much personality in it!!!!!!!!!
Great face expressions!!!
I love that issue so much, because virtually every word on the cover was related to you and your on page 3 and you got a huge two page coverage. The actual winner (coughs) of that competition, only got a brief two page thing - which nobody could care less about lol
And lead to thick people like me asking you "when do you find out if you have won"
As a joke back in april me and my mate tried to do a spoof of that actual cover! It's a classic!
You sold that issue!!!
P.s.
Stop taking those bloody stupid sleeping pills and listen to your doctor freind!!!
Yeeeeeeeek!
damo I was sat at home feeling quite upset (don't know why) and then I read your comment and you made me laugh.
I wanna see that spoof!!!
3 thngs:
we should talk when I'm back as the sleeping thing we have is identical and I've had it bad since 1993
the Axiom cover, as you know, is my favourite, it was after we met but before we became friends. I love it cause despite everything you are/can be/portray you still do actually look happy. and sexy, obviously. I also know you don't like it (perverse as ever)
I seriously hope the Alcazar track is Crying At The Discostheque as it is one of the most brilliantly camp but still brilliant pop records ever released.
Big kiss Jack xx
i'm shocked, you own an Albano and Romina Power song! it's even more camp than alcazar.. is it in italian or greek or some other language?
wow i remember that boyz cover from last year, did you actually keep the rucksack from the shoot? ;)
andre
idrinkartwork: I hearde Felicita in the formative ages of 2 to 8 a million times. I can't pretend I don't like it. (It's in Italian)
Loving the Aussiebums ;-)
Post a Comment